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With the panic buying starting again, I ran out of TP, so I've started using old newspapers. The Times are rough.
(Blame W∴ Balboos, GHB - he started it! @Balboos )
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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You mean you're removing crap with crap?
I'm not sure how many cookies it makes to be happy, but so far it's not 27.
JaxCoder.com
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He said The Times, not The Sun 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
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The only difference between them these days is that The Times doesn't have a page 3 girl. 
Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows.
-- 6079 Smith W.
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Daniel Pfeffer wrote: The Times doesn't have a page 3 gir
So - which sells more papers? More to the point, which would you buy?
One could easily imagine that there's more reason form some guys to take the Sun to the bathroom than the Times!
| Ravings en masse^ |
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| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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If I had to choose between The Times and The Sun, I'd choose The Times. Their crossword puzzle is better.
Of course, I'm in the minority...
Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows.
-- 6079 Smith W.
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The Daily Mirror is used by people who think they run the country; The Guardian is used by people who think they ought to run the country; The Times is used by the people who actually do run the country; the Daily Mail is used by the wives of the people who run the country; the Financial Times is used by people who own the country; the Morning Star is used by people who think the country ought to be run by another country, and the Daily Telegraph is used by people who think it is.
(with apologies the the Rt. Hon. Jim Hacker - Yes, Prime Minister)
Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows.
-- 6079 Smith W.
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"Rolling" on the floor, laughing!
Reflects one of your more Charmin' personality traits.
(also, big run on wiper blades is expected).
| Ravings en masse^ |
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| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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the only TP left is John Wayne TP. Rubs off on you not on it.
To err is human to really mess up you need a computer
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You think that's bad, try using The Post.
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
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I was online doing a purchase - amongst other things, it include nose wipes (i.e., facial tissue) at about half the price anywhere else for brand-name stuff.
So - I had a thought, this AM: what about rolls of ass wipes (i.e., bathroom tissue)? OK - no deals worth getting but I did learn a shocking truth about the decay of all that is soft and textured in the world of personal sanitation:
Some rolls, from pretty much every brand, call themselves "quadruple rolls" and yet only have about 400 wipes/roll. (Angel Soft was 429/roll - just checked out of curiosity). That means, since these are quadruple rolls, that they make rolls with <100/roll. Only slightly exaggerating, apparently one is expected to bring their own roll with them to make it through the session. ( Either that, or a copy of The Guardian . . . )
I mean really? It's bad enough that defective merchandise is now the norm (thank chairman Mr. Xi) and that's become acceptable to the younger and less experienced generations. The only step further downhill one might go is the wipes having holds in them, here and there, from dirt on the pressure rollers.
| Ravings en masse^ |
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| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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Then there's single ply that gets 2 wipes/roll!
I'm not sure how many cookies it makes to be happy, but so far it's not 27.
JaxCoder.com
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A personal bidet is standard issue in most toilets in Asia and the Middle East. Boggles the mind why folks in the west haven't yet got with the program. Not only is it much more hygienic, it's cheaper to use than just toilet paper and creates much less waste. I use a model similar to this:
AVAbay Faucet Hot/Cold Water Bidet[^]
/ravi
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Well, that's definitely a step up from a little bottle of water.
Until someone uses it for colonic irrigation. 
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Greg Utas wrote: Until someone uses it for colonic irrigation.
Damn, you! I'll never be able say CI with a straight face again. 
/ravi
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In much of the Middle East, water is at a premium. I thought sand was the medium of choice in those places. Maybe, for the equivalent of indoor plumbing, something akin to a litter box?
Well - at least, with typical daily exfoliation (in this aspect of life) their will be a considerable number of denizens with remarkably smooth bottoms.
Also, I distinctly recall that, in that part of the world, something about never touching someone with your left hand . . .
| Ravings en masse^ |
|---|
| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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A lot has changed (for the better) in the Middle East and Asia over the past three decades, especially in cities. Not sure if you've flown in or out of DBX (Dubai, UAE) or BOM (Mumbai/Bombay, India) recently. I haven't seen better airports in North America and Europe.
/ravi
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It's October, so pretty soon it will be Xmas adverts time - which I hate with a passion. To be honest, TV ads wind me up all year round, but the Xmas perfume ads are the pinnacle of pointless and annoying. So what would happen if these guys were put in charge of software development?
1. We need mystery. For the first two minutes of being on your new website, the user will be totally clueless about what it does! There will be no obvious aids for navigation. The user is going to have to move the cursor randomly around the screen until they hit something that might be clickable.
2. Grab attention. We need some 'edgy' background music, (that sounds like the police have raided an illegal rave?), and something that flashes enough to cause an epileptic fit.
3. Create a talking point. Let's go with scrolling a pointless, random statement across the screen, which only the marketing/advertising guys 'get'! Here's a starter: “Impossible Is Nothing”.
4. Be bold. No more dark blue on white, sans serif text, in nice orderly columns.We are going with garish typography and clashing colors, splattered randomly across the page.
5. Login is mandatory. Yes, even just to see the home page! Harvesting personal data is the primary aim, so no-one is going to see anything until we know their shoe size and overdraft limit. Don't worry about https, password fields, or storing data securely - or the fact that most visitors are going to think: "Log In? F*** that!". That's not a priority. Getting the orange to black background gradient is the priority!
6. Make it identical to your competitors. "I see what you've done here guys, but it looks nothing like Chanel's Payroll SaaS offering. Let's loop back and ...."
I'm not going to apologise to any marketing/Advertising people on here, (hopefully there aren't any!), as they will only have read the bits in bold - and will probably think this is a handy checklist for when they apply for the Head of IT job. 
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Soooo... websites from the 90s then? 
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They may not run software development, but if you don't give them what they want - you'll hear from upper management.
Such is the way of the world 
Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows.
-- 6079 Smith W.
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I was going to say that they, and especially sales, do run software development. They speak of things not yet built as if they already exist, and then developers have to build them yesterday. But guess who gets the big bonuses?
Don't get me wrong, good ones are well worth it. But there are lots of mediocre ones, just as there are lots of mediocre developers. However, mediocre developers can't do anywhere near as much damage.
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Greg Utas wrote: However, mediocre developers can't do anywhere near as much damage.
Windows 10 updates take the validity of that argument away 
M.D.V. 
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
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1. Microsoft Windows 8 and all promotional websites for Microsoft Server products which use huge numbers of buzzwords but don't actually say why you might want to use the product.
2. All clickbait sites, plus much of Facebook and Medium
3. Most new commercial framework sites and a few FOSS ones too.
4. All 'well-designed' advertising for major products today, eg Lenovo, Corel, you name it
5. Just about every site that actually contains useful information, rather than puff, plus sites that you need to access urgently, but require five forms of identification, including DNA samples and one of your children, before they will allow you to use the click-bait links they position above and below the almost entirely hidden link to the thing that you want, but which now gives a 404 error.
6. Almost all corporate websites for web-design, computer graphics or video editing.
In other words, you are too late - already happened.
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1- create mystery
I visited that web site yesterday in hopes of finding documentation for phpList.
phpList dot com.
I think maybe they're selling hosting ... maybe ...
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Sounds like a flashback to 1997 web sites.
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