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GeneralRe: Is Windows 11 ready to be used? Pin
rtischer827720-Apr-22 2:30
rtischer827720-Apr-22 2:30 
GeneralRe: Is Windows 11 ready to be used? Pin
David Sherwood20-Apr-22 8:12
David Sherwood20-Apr-22 8:12 
GeneralRe: Is Windows 11 ready to be used? Pin
Nick Polyak20-Apr-22 11:02
mvaNick Polyak20-Apr-22 11:02 
GeneralRe: Is Windows 11 ready to be used? Pin
matblue2520-Apr-22 10:30
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GeneralRe: Is Windows 11 ready to be used? Pin
Les Stokes20-Apr-22 13:52
Les Stokes20-Apr-22 13:52 
GeneralRe: Is Windows 11 ready to be used? Pin
KLPounds20-Apr-22 16:12
KLPounds20-Apr-22 16:12 
GeneralRe: Is Windows 11 ready to be used? Pin
FiresChild22-Apr-22 3:10
FiresChild22-Apr-22 3:10 
GeneralBlues rules PinPopular
Ravi Bhavnani19-Apr-22 6:31
professionalRavi Bhavnani19-Apr-22 6:31 
If you're new to the blues, or you like it but never really understood the whys and wherefores, here are some very fundamental rules:
  1. Most Blues begin with: "Woke up this morning..."

  2. "I got a good woman" is a bad way to begin the Blues, unless you stick something nasty in the next line like, "I got a good woman, with the meanest face in town."

  3. The blues is simple. After you get the first line right, repeat it. Then, find something that rhymes -- sort of:
    Got a good woman with the meanest face in town.
    Yes, I got a good woman with the meanest face in town.
    Got teeth like Margaret Thatcher and she weigh 500 pound."

  4. The blues is not about choice. "You stuck in a ditch, you stuck in a ditch...ain't no way out."

  5. Blues cars: Chevys, Fords, Cadillacs, and broken-down trucks. Blues don't travel in Volvos, BMWs, or Sport Utility Vehicles. Most Blues transportation is a Greyhound bus or a southbound train. Jet aircraft and state-sponsored motor pools ain't even in the running. Walkin' plays a major part in the blues lifestyle. So does fixin' to die.

  6. Teenagers can't sing the blues. They ain't fixin' to die yet. Adults sing the blues. In blues, "adulthood" means being old enough to get the electric chair if you shoot a man in Memphis.

  7. Blues can take place in New York City, but not in Hawaii or anywhere in Canada. Hard times in Minneapolis or Seattle are probably just clinical depression. Chicago, St. Louis, Kansas City, Memphis, and N'awlins are still the best places to have the blues. You cannot have the blues in any place that don't get rain.

  8. A man with male pattern baldness ain't the blues. A woman with male pattern baldness is. Breaking your leg 'cause you were skiing is not the blues. Breaking your leg 'cause a alligator be chomping on it is.

  9. You can't have no blues in an office or a shopping mall. The lighting is wrong. Go outside to the parking lot or sit by the dumpster.

  10. Good places for the Blues:
    a. highway,
    b. jailhouse,
    c. empty bed,
    d. bottom of a whiskey glass.

  11. Bad places for the blues:
    a. Nordstrom's,
    b. gallery openings,
    c. Ivy League institutions,
    d. golf courses.

  12. No one will believe it's the blues if you wear a suit, less you happen to be an old person, and you slept in it.

  13. Do you have the right to sing the blues?
    Yes, if:
    a. you're older than dirt,
    b. you're blind,
    c. you shot a man in Memphis,
    d. you can't be satisfied.
    No, if:
    a. you have all your teeth,
    b. you were once blind but now can see,
    c. the man in Memphis lived,
    d. you have a 401 K or trust fund.

  14. Blues is not a matter of color. It's a matter of bad luck. Tiger Woods cannot sing the blues. Sonny Liston could have. Ugly white people also got a leg up on the Blues.

  15. If you ask for water and your darlin' gives you gasoline, it's the blues. Other acceptable blues beverages are:
    a. cheap wine,
    b. whiskey or bourbon,
    c. muddy water,
    d. black coffee.
    The following are NOT Blues beverages:
    a. Perrier,
    b. Chardonnay,
    c. Snapple,
    d. Slim Fast.

  16. If death occurs in a cheap motel or a shotgun shack, it's a blues death. Stabbed in the back by a jealous lover is another blues way to die. So are the electric chair, substance abuse, and dying lonely on a broken-down cot. You can't have a blues death if you die during a tennis match or while getting liposuction.

  17. Some Blues names for women:
    a. Sadie,
    b. Big Mama,
    c. Bessie,
    d. Jennie.

  18. Some Blues names for men:
    a. Joe,
    b. Willie,
    c. Little Willie,
    d. Big Willie.

  19. Persons with names like Michelle, Amber, Jennifer, Debbie, and Heather can't sing the blues no matter how many men they shoot in Memphis.

  20. Blues Name Starter Kit:
    a. name of physical infirmity (Blind, Cripple, Lame, etc.),
    b. first name (see above) plus name of fruit (Lemon, Lime, Peach, etc.),
    c. last name of an earlier US President (Jefferson, Johnson, Fillmore, etc.).
    For example: Blind Lemon Jefferson, Pegleg Lime Johnson, or Cripple Peach Fillmore, etc.

  21. I don't care how tragic your life is; if you own a computer /smartphone and are on Facebook, you cannot sing the blues, period.
/ravi
My new year resolution: 2048 x 1536
Home | Articles | My .NET bits | Freeware
ravib(at)ravib(dot)com

GeneralRe: Blues rules Pin
jeron119-Apr-22 6:43
jeron119-Apr-22 6:43 
GeneralRe: Blues rules Pin
CPallini19-Apr-22 6:52
mveCPallini19-Apr-22 6:52 
GeneralRe: Blues rules Pin
Craig Robbins19-Apr-22 6:54
Craig Robbins19-Apr-22 6:54 
GeneralRe: Blues rules Pin
Ravi Bhavnani19-Apr-22 7:04
professionalRavi Bhavnani19-Apr-22 7:04 
GeneralRe: Blues rules Pin
jeron119-Apr-22 7:04
jeron119-Apr-22 7:04 
GeneralRe: Blues rules Pin
trønderen19-Apr-22 7:17
trønderen19-Apr-22 7:17 
GeneralRe: Blues rules Pin
FreedMalloc19-Apr-22 7:30
FreedMalloc19-Apr-22 7:30 
GeneralRe: Blues rules Pin
PIEBALDconsult19-Apr-22 8:00
mvePIEBALDconsult19-Apr-22 8:00 
GeneralRe: Blues rules Pin
Fynn Laub19-Apr-22 22:22
Fynn Laub19-Apr-22 22:22 
GeneralRe: Blues rules Pin
Slow Eddie20-Apr-22 2:30
professionalSlow Eddie20-Apr-22 2:30 
GeneralRe: Blues rules Pin
MKJCP20-Apr-22 3:54
MKJCP20-Apr-22 3:54 
GeneralRe: Blues rules Pin
MKJCP20-Apr-22 3:51
MKJCP20-Apr-22 3:51 
JokeProbably ancient, but new to me ... Pin
0x01AA19-Apr-22 6:05
mve0x01AA19-Apr-22 6:05 
GeneralRe: Probably ancient, but new to me ... Pin
CPallini19-Apr-22 6:52
mveCPallini19-Apr-22 6:52 
GeneralRe: Probably ancient, but new to me ... Pin
trønderen19-Apr-22 7:27
trønderen19-Apr-22 7:27 
GeneralRe: Probably ancient, but new to me ... Pin
godfetish20-Apr-22 3:55
godfetish20-Apr-22 3:55 
RantYou've got to be elephanting kidding me MS Pin
Dan Neely19-Apr-22 3:43
Dan Neely19-Apr-22 3:43 

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