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I dream of being run over by a Rolls Royce.
I can only afford to be run over by buses, these days.
(Spike Milligan, paraphrased only because I can't remember the exact wording.)
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Apparently he is the author of the funniest joke of all time:
Two hunters are out in the woods in New Jersey when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed.
The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps 'My friend is dead! What can I do?' The operator says: 'Calm down, I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead.' There is a silence, then a shot is heard. Back on the phone, the guy says 'OK, now what?'
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He's the author of thousands of the funniest jokes of forever.
I had the chance to meet him, many years ago, on a trip to Oz, but other priorities (which were really nowhere near as important to me) took precedence.
He died, soon after, so that chance could never be repeated. I could have had a private meeting with a true genius, but passed on it.
Talk about "Regrets, I've had a few".
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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If I forget to put it in the freezer, is that a cache miss?
... such stuff as dreams are made on
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 Of these posts, we do hereby put a freeze on (er, right where) your assets of your depositing them and will bill you for expense of our time spent exchanging responses to the same, however culpable we may be in all this transactional fodder. 
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If you take out the money and put them in your pocket, do you get cold feets then?
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"Icy what you mean", to coin a phase.
| Ravings en masse^ |
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| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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Just got off the phone with the DVLA, allegedly I should get the form today/tomorrow but the 5-10 days is just in case the post is playing up...
... then they ask me ...
... "Have you filled in this other form? No? Don't worry I'll send you one."
Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!
veni bibi saltavi
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I really, really, really feel sad for you. Have some chocolate.
Kitty at my foot and I waAAAant to touch it...
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At this point one has to wonder how close is the DVLA office and do they have a metal detector at the door? 
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If you're gonna drink and drive, make sure you have a vehicle.
... such stuff as dreams are made on
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Ask for the form that documents the fact that you don't like to fill out forms... 
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<smart@rse linux w*nker mode>
You should dump the car and buy a bicycle!
</smart@rse linux w*nker mode>
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Nagy, please reconsider; you are far too young to opt for euthanasia; please tear-up that Death Voluntary License Agreement, now. You are loved, and valued, by so many here. Your oscillations between the antipodes of the bell-curve of the sobriety-drunk continuum provide a valuable benchmark for those of us stumbling around the mean, the median, and the mode.
You can call me and talk this over if you wish; please have your credit-card information ready. Be assured you are not alone in feeling this way.
cheers, Bill
«There is a spectrum, from "clearly desirable behaviour," to "possibly dodgy behavior that still makes some sense," to "clearly undesirable behavior." We try to make the latter into warnings or, better, errors. But stuff that is in the middle category you don’t want to restrict unless there is a clear way to work around it.» Eric Lippert, May 14, 2008
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I just wonder: is there any job post out there in the multiverse that actually omits the bizarre requirement of "being able to work in a fast-paced environment"? Is that really and honestly regarded as a good thing? Also, is the widespread abuse of empty catchy phrases like this one that make them lose their meaning, or is it that they never had one to start with?
Anything that could possibly go wrong in some moment, will definitely go wrong in the worst possible moment...
In the worst way that could be possible! –Finagle's corollary to Murphy's Law (paraphrased).
modified 21-Nov-20 21:01pm.
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Some environments are more fast paced that others; some require the ability to be able to react quickly. Case in point: I was up in the middle of the night with allergies - sneezing and what not. As I didn't want to disturb my wife, I went to the living room.
My cell phone received a text message: a high priority ticket had been logged from work for a system - no data was being shown. Normally, tickets are medium priority unless manually elevated. So, I looked at the ticket, opened my laptop and fixed the issue.
I wasn't the team member on call, but I saw the issue and decided to react. As a team, if the issue is not resolved in a timely manner, we all get hit with a performance failure.
So.. this was 'fast paced', but, generally, it's an easy going environment.
Having said that, if you are looking, what field/general area and what region?
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Message Closed
modified 21-Nov-20 21:01pm.
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Carolinas here.. my mother-in-law (the Mo-mo) lives in Upstate New York - South end of Lake Champlain.
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Leandro Taset wrote: a never ending scene of people running around like crazy headless chickens in face of Armageddon.
Yes, I worked there.
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That's not "fast paced" it's "bad employer". If you're not on-call you shouldn't be receiving messages or having to cover for people in the middle of the night. This is exactly what the OP is getting at, employers that are stuck in the 90s and take the mick...expecting their employees to sacrifice all of their time and personal life for the company, usually unpaid.
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If I'm not on call, I'm not responsible for covering for other people. I CHOSE to assist a colleague... that is my choice. And fast past is always a relative term; it doesn't have to be break neck speed for all tasks.
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"Fast-paced" usually means they have a habit of establishing unrealistically short timelines, coupled with a bloated list of "must-have" features that they want implemented by a small agile team, and by "team", they mean "you".
This message brought to you by CPA (Cynical Programmers of America) - our slogan: "Who ties your shoes for you every day?"
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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Leandro Taset wrote: that actually omits the bizarre requirement of "being able to work in a fast-paced environment"?
Funeral home?
Marc
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
The metaphorical solid rear-end expulsions have impacted the metaphorical motorized bladed rotating air movement mechanism.
Do questions with multiple question marks annoy you???
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