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Me too! 
- I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
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Actually I am, but only because I wanted to get out of the office for a couple of days and needed to spend some training money. The only thing I like about scrum is that it breaks things down into small manageable pieces, though projects tend to drag longer.
I won't renew the certification once it expires. Heck, everything from Scrum Alliance has been marked as spam.
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I got my CSM in 2006 and it expired a while ago, even though, technically, at that time the Scrum Alliance wasn't running things and a CSM certificate wasn't supposed to expire. I have it pinned to my cube wall to remind me what fun I had getting paid time off for three days (and a nice hotel, etc. all on expenses) to attend the course. I have still successfully used some of the techniques on projects though - but I do more development than project management these days - thank goodness!
- I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
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From Wikipedia under Agile:
Incremental software development methods trace back to 1957.[6] In 1974, E. A. Edmonds wrote a paper that introduced an adaptive software development process.[7][8] Concurrently and independently, the same methods were developed and deployed by the New York Telephone Company's Systems Development Center under the direction of Dan Gielan. In the early 1970s, Tom Gilb started publishing the concepts of evolutionary project management (EVO), which have evolved into competitive engineering.[9] During the mid- to late 1970s, Gielan lectured extensively throughout the U.S. on this methodology, its practices, and its benefits.
60 years ago
Under DevOps
History of the term "DevOps"[edit]
At the Agile 2008 conference, Andrew Clay Shafer and Patrick Debois discussed "Agile Infrastructure".[7] The term "DevOps" was popularized through a series of devopsdays starting in 2009 in Belgium.[8] Since then, there have been devopsdays conferences held in many countries worldwide
8 years ago.
The Cloud:
The term cloud has been used to refer to platforms for distributed computing. In Wired's April 1994 feature "Bill and Andy's Excellent Adventure II" on the Apple spin-off General Magic, Andy Hertzfeld commented on General Magic's distributed programming language Telescript that:
"The beauty of Telescript ... is that now, instead of just having a device to program, we now have the entire "Cloud" out there, where a single program can go and travel to many different sources of information and create sort of a virtual service. No one had conceived that before. The example Jim White [the designer of Telescript, X.400 and ASN.1] uses now is a date-arranging service where a software agent goes to the flower store and orders flowers and then goes to the ticket shop and gets the tickets for the show, and everything is communicated to both parties."
20 years ago
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Unless they fire a sh*t ton of PM's and replace them with qualified people, yeah, this is not a surprise.
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If the author's grasp of maths is anything to go by, then this is not a surprise.
Getting from "In 2013, a survey from cloud portfolio management provider Innotas revealed that 50 percent of businesses surveyed had experienced an IT project failure within the previous 12 months" to "More than half of IT projects still failing" is not valid.
In my ever so humble opinion the root of the problem is that even in the most fast moving capitalist of companies, IT project planning still follows a "glorious leap forward" multi-year plan methodology where a chunk of budget is allocated at the start of the year and it's impact is measured at the end of that year or later. This is plainly nonsense and is a management failing not an IT failing.
Instead seed capital should be allocated to each putative project and then the project should receive a fixed percentage of the returned benefit from then on. This ensures successful projects get funded (to become more successful) and unsuccessful projects wither and die.
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I'm not surprised. When I look at the software projects that I have worked on that have failed, I see a common theme. PMs pushing to get the software milestones finished and schmoozing the sponsor making promises that may or may not be obtainable. And the sponsor typically does not know what they want, because they are not developers and never have been; nor have the sponsors explained their work processes to the development team (biggy), nor do they realize that complicated software is like a one-off car that has thousands of parts and a lot of time and work is needed to get it right.
Thus, the main problems I see is that developers focus too much on technology and not enough on the customer's needs and PMs not explaining the devotion needed nor able to extract the business processes from the users. I rarely fault the business unit, most of the time it is the PMs and occasionally the development team.
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Agile is a failure. We need a new methodology. NOW!
This is called the Successful User Completion Software methodology (SUCS):
Our highest priority is to satisfy the customer through early and continuous delivery of valuable software. If deliveries fall short and customer satisfaction declines, we ask the customer for more money and time. Failing that, we blame the customer for bad specs, get a lawyer, and sue them for our failure.
Welcome changing requirements, even late in development. Agile processes harness change for the customer's competitive advantage. After all, change means more money that we can wring out of the customer, and more time to fix the problems they don't know about yet.
Deliver working software frequently, from a couple of weeks to a couple of months, with a preference to the shorter timescale. Of course, while it works, it may not do what the customer wants. Doom anyone?
Business people and developers must work together daily throughout the project. Each can bring a weapon of their choice to the meeting, and whoever is left standing wins.
Build projects around motivated individuals. Give them the environment and support they need, and trust them to get the job done. Summarily being executed when failing to deliver is a great motivator.
The most efficient and effective method of conveying information to and within a development team is face-to-face conversation. Throw out Skype, Slack, and video conferencing software. Pad the project with cost and time to actually fly people around. Once we have them, hold them prisoner until they agree to more money and more time.
Working software is the primary measure of progress. We contract with an independent agency, Trump Clinton LLC, to determine whether the software works.
Agile processes promote sustainable development. The sponsors, developers, and users should be able
to maintain a constant pace indefinitely. And the sooner they have a heart attack, or quit from being overworked, the better, as it takes months for a new person to figure out how we're scamming them.
Continuous attention to technical excellence and good design enhances agility. But since technical excellence is impossible to find, and good design is antithetical to SUCS, we pad the project with 12-120 offshore developers, which frankly, cost less than a couple experts if we could even find them.
Simplicity--the art of maximizing the amount of work not done--is essential. To keep things simple, we do not use any third party frameworks. Just HTML. No Javascript, no JQuery, no Angular, etc. We give keep it simple!
The best architectures, requirements, and designs emerge from self-organizing teams. We re-organize every month, which enables us to charge lots more to the customer because everyone is constantly having to figure out what the guy last month did. More money for us!
At regular intervals, the team reflects on how to become more effective, then tunes and adjusts its behavior accordingly. We have psychologists and life coaches in house to help with the therapy. Failing that, electroshock and waterboarding are effective behavior modification techniques.
Marc
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Let's add a "Key" before "Software" to get an even nicer acronym.
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Marc Clifton wrote: Build projects around motivated individuals. Give them the environment and support they need, and trust them to get the job done. Summarily being executed when failing to deliver is a great motivator.
So your support system consists of a hinged platform an a 'safety' rope? 
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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I don't fail, I just put my projects on hold. Indefinitely.
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"We have removed the Wi-Fi Sense feature that allows you to share Wi-Fi networks with your contacts and to be automatically connected to networks shared by your contacts" I am now Sense-less
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They had more sense to remove? I thought they stopped making Sense since Windows XP...
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
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Either Windows XP or Windows 7...depends
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Both personal and organizational accounts on the code-hosting site will get unlimited private repos and a simplified pricing structure For sharing that code you don't want to share
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NASA announced the release of 56 formerly patented technologies into the public domain, allowing for unrestricted commercial use of their technologies. Now you can own your own space program* (*some assembly required)
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Kent Sharkey wrote: (*some Assembly required)
FTFY.
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If you find that your PC is abnormally slow after installing the update, you may be seeing a problem that I’ve been trying to track down for a couple of weeks. So nice of them to give us the opportunity to debug
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God. Put the current version (actually it was automatically installed) and it seemed to be worse than Windows 8. Even slower still. Have to say some UI improvement from Windows 8 in Windows 10, but still prefer Windows 7. However the new browser got rid of my favorites, and that was the only good reason I had for staying with IE. I liked being able to keep backups of my favorites, and move them to my other computers.
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You can export/import them using an XML File in Firefox and I suppose that other browsers have something to make them portable
M.D.V. 
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
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Realm has just announced Realm Xamarin, a new edition of their database built specifically for the Xamarin framework. A native database for a cross-platform tool?
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Half of PCs running on Windows XP are still running IE 7 or IE 8 but it's not just antique PCs that are running the unsupported old browser. And that's why we still can't use Flexbox
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Oh what shall we ever do.
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