The Lounge - CodeProject

First Prev Next

Re: I just ordered a life alert bracelet...

BillWoodruff4-Jan-16 23:23

BillWoodruff

4-Jan-16 23:23

We appreciate your requesting our service, but your application for life notification has been refused because we do not believe you are fully dead.

While you do present compelling, well-documented, evidence for brain-death, we cannot rule out you are still alive, albeit in some vegetative state, nor can we reject the possibility you are a revenant controlled by some outside entity whose biological systems still function even though directed by said outside entity.

We appreciate your application, and look forward to being able to say you are completely dead, at which time, of course, we will be happy to have you as our valued customer !

Sincerely yours, Enthea Theogonous, Customer Support Representative,

YouAreAliveNow.com

«Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn.» Benjamin Franklin

Re: I just ordered a life alert bracelet...

Daniel Pfeffer5-Jan-16 0:14

Daniel Pfeffer

5-Jan-16 0:14

How about those spending a year dead for tax purposes? Are they eligible for the service?

Smile | :)

If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time - a tremendous whack.

--Winston Churchill

Thought of the Weak

MacSpudster4-Jan-16 8:03

MacSpudster

4-Jan-16 8:03

I have 4* Dads and Moms who collectively claim me as theirs 50%** of the time.

No wonder they call me "Half-pint".

I'd prefer "236.588 Milliliter Man".

====
*true, that
**ok, really, 100% of the time, but go with the joke... Cool | :cool:

Re: Thought of the Weak

Mike Hankey4-Jan-16 8:21

Mike Hankey

4-Jan-16 8:21

Better than having parents that are bakers and claiming you 50% of the time...then you might be called half-baked?

New version: WinHeist Version
They all laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at them because they're all the same. Kurt Cobain

Re: Thought of the Weak

MacSpudster4-Jan-16 8:59

MacSpudster

4-Jan-16 8:59

Good one.
That title goes to the joke!

Re: Thought of the Weak

Sander Rossel4-Jan-16 10:51

Sander Rossel

4-Jan-16 10:51

MacSpudster wrote:
they call me "Half-pint"

I call you full wasted... Unsure | :~

Visit my blog at Sander's bits - Writing the code you need.
Or read my articles at my CodeProject profile.

Simplicity is prerequisite for reliability.
— Edsger W. Dijkstra

Regards,
Sander

Re: Thought of the Weak

MikeWBroughton5-Jan-16 6:13

MikeWBroughton

5-Jan-16 6:13

If they call you that whilst they are collectively claiming you for 50% of the time, must we assume that they collectively disown you for the other 50%? OMG | :OMG:

Re: Thought of the Weak

MacSpudster5-Jan-16 6:30

MacSpudster

5-Jan-16 6:30

Assume you did, though I'll actively *not* include myself in the inferential.

If one actively claims 50% or any other less-than-100%, this does not equate to that of one actively *disclaiming* the remainder (e.g, 50% disowned).

One can actively give food to a homeless person 50% of the time and, as well, leave food for anyone to enjoy the other 50%, which is not the same as actively NOT giving food to the homeless person 50% of the time.

Butt, like another comment noted, the joke is half-baked (which is actively purposed!).

Desktop Wallpaper

Kevin Marois4-Jan-16 6:54

Kevin Marois

4-Jan-16 6:54

Desktop Wallpaper - What's yours look like? Share if it's appropriate.

Mine>[^]

If it's not broken, fix it until it is

Welcome to the Lounge