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I always make sure the cat's properly grounded, connected by several feet of heavy chain. River bottoms make the best grounds, but a deep lake will do in a pinch.
Will Rogers never met me.
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A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"
The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."
"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.
"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"
"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."
The man below replies, "You must work in management."
"I do," replies the balloonist, "But how'd you know?"*
"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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so which one is Leslie Nielsen?
You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start
Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.
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Both 
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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Seems like this joke is commin round a lot ... 
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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It does float about.
Mongo: Mongo only pawn... in game of life.
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At an interview, a programmer is asked what he would do if the microwave would catch fire. He says he would throw it out the window. Baffled, the interviewer asks "okay, what if the coffee brewer catches fire?" And the programmer replies "Put it in the microwave and throw it out the window, as we already have a solution for that problem."
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Oso Oluwafemi Ebenezer wrote: coffee brewer catches fire?
Oso Oluwafemi Ebenezer wrote: and throw it out the window
you can not throw ![Java | [Coffee]](https://codeproject.global.ssl.fastly.net/script/Forums/Images/coffee.gif) out the window!
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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You can throw burnt coffee out the window.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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You can if your language's "object" definition supports IDefenestratable - most real world modelling systems do 
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A 5 for knowing what defenestration means. 
I presume you've read this[^] 
Will Rogers never met me.
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In a twisted sort of way, that shows exactly what is wrong with coders these days... 
Hey, I have a hammer! Every problem is a nail!
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Yes, everybody knows that if the microwaver burns, you simply buy a new one.
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Well that, and the interviewer never said they got a new microwave... so how can you put the coffee maker in it to throw it out the window?
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that's easy, you run outside and retrieve the old microwave - then put the coffee machine in it, you are not thinking the problem through
You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start
Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.
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But what if your on the 12th floor? do you run really fast?
Every day, thousands of innocent plants are killed by vegetarians.
Help end the violence EAT BACON
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No I am programmer, I don't run fast
You cant outrun the world, but there is no harm in getting a head start
Real stupidity beats artificial intelligence every time.
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Who said speed matters? That'd be premature optimization. 
Of course, you could simply install a spare microwave to catch the exception.
GOTOs are a bit like wire coat hangers: they tend to breed in the darkness, such that where there once were few, eventually there are many, and the program's architecture collapses beneath them. (Fran Poretto)
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Clearly not a real-time programmer then!
It's not a question of optimization, it's a question of a race condition.
Life is like a s**t sandwich; the more bread you have, the less s**t you eat.
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Hah, you're right! Efficiency was never part of the question!
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Pualee wrote: In a twisted sort of way, that shows exactly what is wrong with coders managers these days...
FTFY.
Life is too shor
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Can't put the coffee machine in the microwave - it's made of metal and might catch fire.
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Ah, our are isolated with wood, so this cannot happen. Deutsche Qualität.
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