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May I interest you in a sausage? Inabun?[^]
speramus in juniperus
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Wanna 100 year old egg Shogun? Fresh in today?
Never underestimate the power of stupid things in large numbers
--- Serious Sam
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True, very true (I speak as a person who went for a drink one night in Nice (south O' France) ended up in a bar surrounded by local fisher men (& related trades, nudge, nudge, wink, wink!) great place. But as wussy Westerners we might not have the related bacteria/worms in our digestive tract to deal with some of the stuff that doesn't affect the locals. I heard something about if you have parasitic worms in you gut you don't get ulcers (Infinite Monkey Cage, Radio 4, I think...). A little dirt is good, however the spices, tastes in curry mean dodgy meat can be used, which in the locals might give wind, to a foreigner might give two months on a drip!
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I had to fix some software like that once...
Never moon a werewolf.
- Harvey
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Simples...
Forks should be placed Tines Up on the left hand side of the plate, the knife to the right with the blade edge pointing left.
Once finished, the fork should be placed on the plate, next to and parallel with the knife, tines down.
The plate should also be pushed forward slightly.
This indicates to one's butler that you have finished that course.
Uneaten food should also be pushed to the 10pm position.
This is so that when several plates are being picked up they can be placed in the left hand/arm of the attending servant.
---------------------------------
Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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Dang & blast got it wrong  now however correctly armed with the info I can no longer be view as a chav, NEDS or common as muck! 
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Dalek Dave wrote: tines down
A man of breading. Poor breading.
The tines are always up, finished or not. If you need to place the weapons on the plate, but haven't finished, then they go at twenty to four and when the course is over at six thirty.
:sheesh:
speramus in juniperus
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Not when placing the cutlery on the table before the meal they don't.
Sheesh, were you raised in a cafe or summut?
---------------------------------
Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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Quote: A man of breading. Poor breading.
Sir I refer you to my first reply
Quote: (I do know which way to pass the port etc.)?
...and mix a good gin & tonic, vodka & tonic, vodka & Russian, whiskey & tonic, whiskey sour, white Russian, black Russian most cocktails. My breeding can't really be faulted for that. If it involves alcohol I am sorted... 
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Nagy Vilmos wrote: A man of breading. Poor breading.
You don't need a fork to eat bread[^]! 
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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Okay already, spilling is hard! 
speramus in juniperus
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looking at the page, why?, will somebody please tell me WHY it is always cats, these people should be run from the internet with pitch forks and torches!
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If you mean whilst eating...Firstly one should NEVER cut one's food into small pieces the place the knife down and put the fork in the right hand before eating with the tines up, (like a bowl of a spoon).
Having food cut up for eating is what one does for children.
Adults should NEVER do this.
The correct etiquette is that one cuts one's food as one eats, so the knife remains in the right hand, and the fork in the left.
The fork is used to transfer food, tines down, to the mouth.
The knife is used to push the food onto the fork.
I have seen Americans do the 'I am a child and need my food cutting into manageable pieces' thing then proceeding to use the fork the wrong way up and in the wrong hand.
Annoying as hell!
The reason the fork always stays in the left hand and the knife in the right is because at formal dinners there is often not much room and two elbows clashing as one person cannot be bothered to use gobbling irons correctly means spilt food and messy clothes.
Hope this helps.
---------------------------------
Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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Again thank You, a source to the finer things are you (to get Yoda-ish) I must admit your explanation is better than the one I was given as a child (mostly forgotten as you can see from question)
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And if you have any control at all of your arms, wrists and hand, then there is no reason to have them splayed out towards your dining companions. Simply tuck them into your side and use the fork and knife as you see fit.
If you are not touching not spraying your dining companions with food, then who are they to care HOW you prepare and consume YOUR food.
I grew up in a family of 11; somehow, we all managed to sit at the table, together, cut and consume our food without bashing elbows or each other... it just takes practice and concern for others.
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Mod this through the fact I'm from the North and find these middle-class fripperies hilarious, but:
Tines up [^], tines down is a continental custom, and therefore to be discouraged.
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And that site is bookmarked to save future embarrassment 
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Ah, but oop north they cannot afford cutlery and often just eat straight from t'trough
Also, when eating soup, NEVER tilt the bowl, better to leave a little than tilt a bowl, and if it really is unavoidable, tilt away, not toward.
Ensure always that one arranges, where possible, that the guests are seated boy/girl/boy/girl.
Never allow 13 for dinner, if there are 13 diners, set a 14th place.
Wine should always be served by the man, a woman should NEVER pick up the wine bottle.
Hosts should always ensure that the eldermost lady be served first, guests should not start eating until the host sits.
Port should always be passed to the left (Port Side).
---------------------------------
Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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Public School*, followed by collegiate university** dear boy: There is a difference between knowing the path, and finding the path ridiculous.
* ish
** ish-ish.
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Dalek Dave wrote: a woman should NEVER pick up the wine bottle.
Well that is a no brainer; with most women they would likely swig it all. 
Common sense is admitting there is cause and effect and that you can exert some control over what you understand.
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Well I hope not, mind you I haven't seen them in the same place at the same time!.....
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Movie Quote Of The Day
With Ten Bears, it was always more than a while. There was purpose in everything he did, and I knew he wanted me to stay. But I was sure of myself. I would be an excuse, and that's all the Army would need to find this place. I pushed him as far as I could to move the camp. But in the end, he only smiled and talked of simple pleasures. He reminded me that at his age, a good fire was better than anything. Ten Bears was an extraordinary man.
Which movie?
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Flashdance? The Animal House version?
Never underestimate the power of stupid things in large numbers
--- Serious Sam
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