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Thank you. It's been far too long since I read something as cloying as that. I think I just sicked up a bit.
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Wow! The response to this is Harry Potter is like Every Developer, because it is pure and utter drivel. BTW, I'm nothing like Potter, I'm more of a Mustrum Ridcully; even got the desk.
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A question on the site has really made my blood boil. I'm not going to link to the question, but one sentence in it really got me annoyed.
"Pretend you're a principal consultant at a consulting firm and you want to demonstrate the value and sophistication that your firm can bring to the table. Please make a data access layer proposal that would help support this goal."
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nothing to say 'bout that question 
In code we trust !
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Pretend you don't see that question. In that case you will prevent your blood from boiling. 
Don't mind those people who say you're not HOT. At least you know you're COOL.
I'm not afraid of falling, I'm afraid of the sudden stop at the end of the fall! - Richard Andrew x64
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Or better yet: Delete the shite. That way all of our collective blood is prevented from boiling... 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-----
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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To answer that question:
"I propose we make use of a data layer, because it will bring valule and sophistication to the table!" *Loud applause from my peers for such an amazing proposal*
It's an OO world.
public class SanderRossel : Lazy<Person>
{
public void DoWork()
{
throw new NotSupportedException();
}
}
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Yeah, who wouldn't want valule on the table?
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-----
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Found the original. Sounds more like a college assignment to me. Business school, maybe? Their lecturers would talk like that.
Cheers,
Peter
Software rusts. Simon Stephenson, ca 1994. So does this signature. me, 2012
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Can't really see what's so exceptional about that. It does actually comprise real words forming real sentences so it could be worse.
I'm afraid we're all to blame - us - the computer people. We gave everyone a computer and an internet connection and now must face judgment of what we have done. It's only going to get worse so may as well embrace it. Stick a funny picture on facebook or something.
What the Hell am I on about. Too early, not enough sleep. "Barista, Flat White!"
Regards,
Rob Philpott.
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It's unfair! You censored the best parts...
I think we should create a forum to store such gems...
I'm not questioning your powers of observation; I'm merely remarking upon the paradox of asking a masked man who he is. (V)
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Oh, if you look around (and it wouldn't need to be too hard a look), you'll find the forums full of such gems.
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You're pertaining to Q&A, are you? 
Don't mind those people who say you're not HOT. At least you know you're COOL.
I'm not afraid of falling, I'm afraid of the sudden stop at the end of the fall! - Richard Andrew x64
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I propose that we only code our variables in French to show our sophistication , and we name our classes in Latin so that we can be seen as polyglots. I also propose that our comments can only be quotes from French philosophers , Ghandi or Buddha . We should also only have £20 a bottle tap water on the table at any meeting . That should do it .
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That's all? I've been doing that for ages. I bet you think everything will be much better then, but as Jean-Paul Sartre said: "Du même coup, j'ai appris qu'on perd toujours. Il n'y a que les Salauds qui croient gagner."
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-----
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Pete O'Hanlon wrote: value and sophistication that your firm can bring to the table
How 'bout references and pointers? Can I bring those to the table?
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I can bring my milkshake to the yard. I could teach you, but I'd have to charge.
I have no idea why that came to mind.
Alberto Brandolini: The amount of energy necessary to refute bullshit is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it.
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Abhinav S wrote: So Yoda does get angry.
No no no!
"Angry Yoda does get."
FTFY 
"State acheived after eating too many chocolate-covered coconut bars - bountiful"
Chris C-B
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Pete O'Hanlon wrote: "Pretend you're a principal consultant at a consulting firm and you want to demonstrate the value and sophistication that your firm can bring to the table. Please make a data access layer proposal that would help support this goal."
Ali's Thinking
"bring to the table" ... ... maybe food or a meal?
"data" ... ... ... ... that's tricky, they must mean the menu?
"value" ... ... ... ... well to bring value I guess I need to include diamonds somewhere and maybe gold
"sophistication" ... ... I must include a classy drink like Cinzano or Babycham!
Okay, my answer is,
"I will bring to the table a gold and diamond encrusted menu, listing a choice of sweet sickly alcoholic drinks."
I think that should get me an A++! 
"State acheived after eating too many chocolate-covered coconut bars - bountiful"
Chris C-B
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I found this exact text on another site - the person who posted it has an account which is 7 years old. You'd have thought he/she'd be beyond this drivel by now.
My guess is it's an interview/job app question, though most principal consultants (in one of the "big" firms) I've worked with have degrees in an "-ology" in anything other than technology and could barely tie their shoelaces together from an IT point of view.
Alberto Brandolini: The amount of energy necessary to refute bullshit is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it.
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I can only find it on one other site - posted at about the same time as the question was posted here.
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I'll pretend you're an ignorant school child that is not only to lazy to do the assignment yourself but also so uncreative to even put the question in your own words. You have a long road ahead of you.
As I grow older I've found that pleasing everyone is impossible but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake.
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