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Things I’ve learned
1. You can’t control what happens to you. You can only control how you deal with it.
2. Nothing is ever as good as it seems, nothing is ever bad as it seems.
3. An ounce of hard work will overcome ten pounds of inspiration.
4. Creativity is a rare natural talent. It can’t be induced, taught or trained. Very few people have it and it should be treasured.
5. There is really no such thing as a free lunch.
6. Life isn’t fair.
7. It’s a random chance universe.
8. There is no such thing as luck. Good or Bad.
9. You get what you pay for. You don't get anything if you don't.
10. Envy is stupid and harmful.
11. Pride is just like Envy.
12. Money can’t make you happy. It can, however, remove a lot of the things that make you unhappy.
13. Anyone that is constantly “happy” is heading for a nervous breakdown.
14. Beware of anyone that wears their religion on their shirtsleeve. They believe they have a divine right to screw you over.
15. Prejudice of any kind is incredibly stupid.
16. Any man claiming to understand women is delusional.
17. Fear is a built-in survival trait.
18. Dealing with things that overwhelm you is like eating an elephant, by taking one bite at a time.
19. Truly good friends are extremely hard to find. Treasure the ones you have.
20. Women have it all figured out. Men don’t have a clue.
21. When it comes to wives, what’s yours is hers and what’s hers is hers.
22. Change is inevitable, and un-stoppable. Go with the flow.
23. Insanity is hereditary. Your children are guaranteed to drive you crazy.
24. People say they want to be free, but often forget that the key component of personal freedom is the requirement that you take responsibility for your actions. (Paraphrasing Terry Pratchett)
25. Acronyms rarely communicate Information and should never be used.
26. A quiet peaceful life is the best that can be hoped for.
27. Isaac Asimov, Robert Heinlein, Terry Pratchett, and William Gibson are geniuses.
28. Whining is pointless. No one will listen to it. Just suck it up and get on with it.
29. “42” is not the meaning of Life, the Universe, and everything. I don’t have a clue what is.
30. War is insanity, tragic, and a terrible waste at a governmental level.
31. There are many good people. There are also a lot of bad rotten people. Learn to tell the difference.
32. All politicians lie. Without exception.
33. Taxes are worse than death. Death only comes once. – (Terry Pratchett)
34. Chaos is the baseline state of the universe.
35. You don’t always get what you pay for.
36. Alcohol and drug abuse is self-destructive and should be avoided.
37. Doctors may be the ones that cure you, but it is the nurses that keep you alive, while it’s happening.
38. Everybody makes mistakes. How we deal with them; how we strive to ensure not to make the same mistake again; these define what type of human we are. (thanks O.G.)
39. If you treat most strangers with respect and friendship, they will respond the same way.
40. Expressing gratitude to the people that help you out, is not only polite, it is the surest way of making it happen again, the next time you need their help.
41. Turning the other cheek is guaranteed to get you slapped again.
42. Sorry for the inconvenience.
43. The hot sex doesn't last. Good cooking does.
44. If you don't take care of yourself, you can't take care of anybody else.
45. Most good deeds do go unpunished. Some bad deeds don't.
46. Violence is the last resort of the incompetent.
47. What goes around does not always come around.
48. Most older folk's 1st wish is that they'd taken better care of their teeth. I'm one of them.
49. Getting older is hell, and it doesn't always beat the alternative.
50. It is pointless to be afraid of dying as it is inevitable.
51. People who ride bicycles in motorized traffic are asking for broken bones. Taking their children with them is Child Abuse.
52. Never hate anyone. Today's foe may become a colleague tomorrow. (Thanks Amaranth)
53. Love is definitely not all you need.
54. I will never understand tattoos or body piercing.
55. It is impossible to be unique.
56.There is no wisdom to be found in chat rooms… (Thanks DRHuff)
56(a) There is even less wisdom to be found in chat rooms frequented by developers and engineers. Pedanticism? Of course. Insults? Sometimes. Wisdom? Meh... (Thanks fgs1963)
57. Someone who treats the waitstaff badly is not a good person. (This is true EVERY time.) (Thanks Peter Kelly)
58. Always be EXTREMLY careful when zipping up you fly.
59. Everyone, without exception, gets their share of grief and pain in this life.
60. Never start a physical confrontation with anyone. However, if someone starts one with you, knock the bas***d down and kick him until your leg gets tired.
61. Nothing is better than doing something right the first time.
62. I have just realized this list is my personal phlisophy, words to live by.
Ed
modified 29-Oct-21 15:25pm.
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Too bad you didn't have 5 more, you could have moved 29 to 42. Would have been very poetic.
I’ve given up trying to be calm. However, I am open to feeling slightly less agitated.
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Did not have time. 5 more are coming soon, Stay tuned.
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38) Everybody makes mistakes. How we deal with them; how we strive to ensure not to make the same mistake again; these define what type of human we are.
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Furthering this, you don't make mistakes if you're not trying.
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Would #9 and #35 cancel each other?
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
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No. # 35 is a subset of #9. Also, #9 should have added "you Don't get anything at all, if you don't.
Edits coming..,,
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Slow Eddie wrote: Edits coming..,,
Like the list numbering scheme? 
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
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Guess you could write #9 as: Everything has a cost.
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39. Never hate anyone. Today's foe may become a colleague tomorrow.
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so that's why some people get so pale when I ask them where we have met before...
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
His last invention was an evil Lasagna. It didn't kill anyone, and it actually tasted pretty good.
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Some people - even colleagues - are like Slinkies.
Completely useless except to bring a smile to your face when you push them down the stairs ...
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Hmmph! Slinkies are much more useful! Lotta things you can do with them. And that's not counting the oversize ones we had in the hall in high school physics. Twintw feet of loose spring to study waves.
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I like more the alternative version:
Be careful whose foot you step on today, it might be able to kick your ass tomorrow.
M.D.V. 
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
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Never say Never. Almost everytime. Never becomes hmm did that just happen?
Also, Never say everytime or always! Sure as certain it won't
To err is human to really elephant it up you need a computer
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Slow Eddie wrote: nothing is ever bad as it seems
You must never have had a dog die on you.
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- There is no wisdom to be found in chat rooms…
If you can't laugh at yourself - ask me and I will do it for you.
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0. There is even less wisdom to be found in chat rooms frequented by developers and engineers. Pedanticism? Of course. Insults? Sometimes. Wisdom? Meh... 
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Slow Eddie wrote: 51. People who ride bicycles in motorized traffic are asking for broken bones
Just wanted to say that sometimes those people, like me, don't have a choice but to ride in traffic because the (kilometers long) bike lane is (all) occupied with parked cars.
Besides, traffic rules in my country (Portugal) dictate that, when there is no bike lane, we must ride in traffic because we are basically compared scooters with just two differences: 1- we do not require any license because we have no engine/motor or it is limited to 25km/h; 2- we must ride in the rightmost 50cm of the rightmost lane of the direction we want.
Slow Eddie wrote: Taking their children with them is Child Abuse.
I totally agree.
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Take a bus, cab, Lyft. or Uber. It will considerably less expensive, in the long run, than broken hip surgery.
It's the bicycle riders that don't feel the traffic laws apply to them, that aggravates motorists the most.
Also you guys are difficult to see, too slow to keep up with the flow, and if god forbid, a car does run into you, it will be the motorist who is found to be at fault, even if it is the bicycle rider who caused the accident by failing to obey traffic laws.
I can not tell you how many times I have had to pull into another lane to pass the same cyclist, because I stop for traffic signals and the cyclist does not, pulling ahead of me.
Finally, many cyclists ride in the dark, wearing dark colored clothes, with no light of any kind. Those guys, in my opinion, are just plain suicidal.
Sorry to vent on you, as I am sure you don't do those kind of things. Please be careful when you are out there.
ed
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Slow Eddie wrote: It's the bicycle riders that don't feel the traffic laws apply to them, that aggravates
That aggravates me too. Sometimes I wish I could catch them and slap the idiot out of them. Unfortunately, it is not only bicycle riders that think like that here but also some pedestrians, skaters, car/truck/bus drivers, etc.
In fact, I wish I could do this to them  Slap Countdown - YouTube[^]
Slow Eddie wrote: Take a bus, cab, Lyft. or Uber
I ride a bicycle for exercise, as health issues prevent me from doing other types of exercise that would keep me away from the streets, like running. I try to keep myself on the bicycle lane but there are always some idiot(s) parked on it. More than once, I was almost ran over by idiots that turn suddenly (without signaling) into the bicycle lane to park there.
Slow Eddie wrote: Also you guys are difficult to see
I have my lights always on, even during the day as required by law (same as scooters), wear light colors during the day and a fluorescent yellow jacket starting at dusk or before dawn.
Slow Eddie wrote: too slow to keep up
Actually, many times I have to ding-ding them to move 
Slow Eddie wrote: even if it is the bicycle rider who caused the accident by failing to obey traffic laws
Here in Portugal, this would be the riders fault and he would most likely have to pay a fine, pay for all the damages and, if he has a drivers license, points would be reduced from his drivers license (and if it gets to zero or less points, he has his license revoked)
Slow Eddie wrote: I can not tell you how many times I have had to pull into another lane to pass the same cyclist, because I stop for traffic signals and the cyclist does not, pulling ahead of me.
I am not very fit (many cyclists ride faster than me) yet, strangely, this already happened to me too 
Slow Eddie wrote: many cyclists ride in the dark, wearing dark colored clothes, with no light of any kind
Yep. If I was a cop I would earn my monthly pay giving tickets to just one of those. The ticket values are the same as for a scooter/car driver so, for the infractions of : 1- not visible (clothes) ; 2- not visible (reflectors) ; 3- no lights or lights not conformant with the law ; 4- not riding on the rightmost 50cm of the lane ; 5- riding in opposite direction of the street direction (see this one and the next a lot) ; 6- and riding on the sidewalk. I do not remember the values for the others but for number 5 alone is €960 (almost got a ticket for this once because I missed the sign that was covered by a tall truck parked on the sidewalk in the corner of the intersection).
Slow Eddie wrote: Sorry to vent on you
No problem.
Maybe we just found another thing for the list: - slap idiots (when nobody is looking)
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A great list! can I suggest this one?
"Someone who treats the waitstaff badly is not a good person. (This is true EVERY time.)"
[ Thanks to Dave Barry. I think he said it ]
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