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Dear Valued Team Member, Devindra,

We have evaluated your request to increase your daily methamphetamines allowance, and, given the results of your most recent blood-screening profile, we must say, in the interests of the Team, we cannot grant that request.

We have detected trace amounts of MDMA aka "Ecstasy" [^] in your blood; as you know, MDMA is not an approved substance for your Team.

It is in the interests of the Team to avoid excessive empathy, and distracting personal insights, or inappropriate bonding behavior: all of which are associated with this drug.

Since your work is excellent, and your behavior in SCRUM slug-fests is appropriate, we will take no punitive action at this time.

However, per your contract, your supplementation will be modified to include:

1) daily: 5 mg. of Xanax given orally

2) 1x weekly: LSD 25 micro-grams to be given orally 2hrs. before Friday SCRUM.

Do be aware that if the next screening shows any signs of unauthorized drugs ... or indicates you have not taken your approved supplements ... further action may be required.

Please schedule a private session with our substance-counsellor bot.

Sincerely, Edwina Hawkins,
Substance Enhancement Committee

Liars, Vipers, Jokers and Fakes:

we have a man in a room with a photograph of you and a very long list
we really get around everybody is written down, nobody ever gets missed
we know you through and through - know more about you than you know about yourself
we got a magical machine that has every word you speak and can write it all down
so you better watch your mouth or we'll come knock on your door.

we are the liars and vipers and jokers and fakes everywhere you go
the liars and vipers and jokers and fakes on your radio
we are the liars and vipers and jokers and fakes in the driver's seat
we are the liars and vipers and the clowns at the wheels of history