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Part time sanitation engineer, part time lion tamer, part time priest, part time vampire, part time snake charmer, part time psychologist.
Depends on what sh*t code you're working on for a project you inherited, which uses some front-end framework you know nothing about, so you have to pray a lot and suck the blood out of SO and otherwise charm the code into working while appeasing management.
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Yeah, experience in the dark arts is certainly a must for our kind. 
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Archaeologist -- I dig through the layers of old cities (Business Logic & obsolete code) to find civilizations, old clay pots & bones trapped under the heaps of dust and debris.
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...and get cursed for it.
GCS d--(d-) s-/++ a C++++ U+++ P- L+@ E-- W++ N+ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t+ 5? X R+++ tv-- b+(+++) DI+++ D++ G e++ h--- r+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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Drain cleaner.
Quite a bit of crap has slowly accumulated over time in production code.
Suddenly, the flow, instead of gurgling through the cruddy* pipes, comes to a dead stop.
Somebody has to get in and clean out the gunk.
That is the job that falls to the programmer tasked with making the system work again, perhaps with new requirements thrown in to make things more difficult.
- Now you know why database commands are referred to as CRUD (Create, Retrieve, Update, Delete)!😂😂😂
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I'd have pointed out that math is more exciting
Bastard Programmer from Hell 
"If you just follow the bacon Eddy, wherever it leads you, then you won't have to think about politics." -- Some Bell.
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It's somewhere mid-range between being a Michaelangelo apologist sculptor and an herbal proctologist.
Software Zen: delete this;
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There are so many areas... there is game development, business apps, mobile apps, scientific apps, etc. So you'll get many valid answers depending on the area. Scientist, artist, magician, builder, engineer, etc. 
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it's sedentary work. it requires continuous self motivated learning. Other than that it's like being a machine whisperer....
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There is a reason my title is Wizard.
Nothing succeeds like a budgie without teeth.
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Just don't Google what "Wizard's Sleeve" means! 
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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Builder.
We get to build new stuff - and are then lumbered with the maintenance and alterations. Sometimes, (if we are lucky), we get to knock it all down and start again. But most of the time we battle to tack on extensions to inadequate foundations.
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It's like being a sculptor. You hammer, chisel away, measure and try to figure out how to get the shape you want from the material you have.
All the while sweating and swearing.
GCS d--(d-) s-/++ a C++++ U+++ P- L+@ E-- W++ N+ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t+ 5? X R+++ tv-- b+(+++) DI+++ D++ G e++ h--- r+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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Being a sculptor where the users choose the medium, but management already has picked out the paint brushes you have to use!
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This is true on so many levels... 
GCS d--(d-) s-/++ a C++++ U+++ P- L+@ E-- W++ N+ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t+ 5? X R+++ tv-- b+(+++) DI+++ D++ G e++ h--- r+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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firefighter (on occasions!)
A new client calls you, you know nothing about the system which is DOWN and the client is losing £10k/hour. There is a certain amount of stress involved and you're in damage-limitation mode. Afterwards when things are wet and smouldering you step through doing a forensic investigation to find out what caused it all and then specify a new fire detection system and sprinklers.
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Doctor.
If the job gets exciting, it means something has gone badly wrong for someone.
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Like marriage...
At first it starts like a romantic dream, but soon enough, it becomes more like "accepting your fate".
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Cabinet Making. Sometimes you make a beautiful finely finished product. Sometimes you make a plywood box.
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"Blood Sweat and Tears"
ed
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A mental rollercoaster ride.
Just make sure you keep a copy of everything you developed so that when you need to develop something else a year later or more, you may be able to find the solution in your past applications; rather than spend hours or days searching Google only to find yourself wasting time because a large percentage of the posts do not work.
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On a good day, it's like being a mathematician. Usually it's like being a copy editor, and the text you're dealing with was written by a monkey and in some fake language that has rules so convoluted that you cannot remember more than half of the rules at the time.
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Dentistry.
Extract the bad stuff, fill it in with slightly less (in your opinion) bad stuff.
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As I tell people who need help with their PCs:
Programming is like writing a novel.
IT support is like operating a printing press.
Truth,
James
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