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Or you could just remember that he is a 5 year old kid and just toss the damned balls back over the yard.
If you can't laugh at yourself - ask me and I will do it for you.
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Exactly. 
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I don't like kids and I don't like gardening, so that's probably the worst idea I've ever heard 
My garden is only some grass though, and I'm not letting a 5-year old use an electric mower 
He could clear out the weeds in my front lawn, which are currently about half a meter high and probably already the talk of the neighborhood 
My next house will be one without a garden.
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Nah, I'll wait with the hard drugs until he's at least a few years older though 
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You gotta be careful doing that kind of thing these days: somebody is going to ... umm ... assume the worst about your reasons ...
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Exactly.
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Or sue him for hurting the kid's feelings.
M.D.V. 
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
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No, no - you don't "hurt their feelings" you "cause him long-term psychological trauma" resulting in a need for "ongoing costs for the foreseeable future", and "massive payouts for the shysters ambulance chasers lawyers" involved.
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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OriginalGriff wrote: assume the worst about your reasons
Well, it's BBQ weather again...
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You can't BBQ a 5 year old! 
It'll be burnt on the outside, and still raw in the middle.
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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You had me in the first half, not gonna lie
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Can't you just throw your beer cans into his?
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You mean Everclear bottles, don't you? Sander is a one-man flame-throwing monster!
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Wait, what?
I drink mostly alcohol free
Anyway, my neighbor would be most grateful for such bottles 
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...traumatized him ... ???
Ah, you must have omitted the braces around your one-liners!
Software rusts. Simon Stephenson, ca 1994. So does this signature. me, 2012
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I'm not that cruel! 
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It sounds to me that you have him by the balls.
If pigs could fly, just imagine how good their wings would taste!
- Harvey
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If you child proof your house, how do the kids still keep getting in?
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Mine kept sneaking in through the pet door.
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OriginalGriff wrote: how do the kids still keep getting in?
They forget to close the barn door?
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
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Perhaps the problem is the child-proofing on the wife. 
Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows.
-- 6079 Smith W.
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Or the husband. Both just to be sure.
Scott
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The stork drops them down the chimney.
It was only in wine that he laid down no limit for himself, but he did not allow himself to be confused by it.
― Confucian Analects: Rules of Confucius about his food
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