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Let's give it a try then.
I have lived with several Zen masters - all of them were cats.
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... that my printer talks to me!
I'm printing a birthday card for a friend, and in "best photo" quality on "matt paper" it sits there printing and repeating, over and over:
Calm down.
Calm down.
Calm down.
...
Clearly it realises it should have taken the 255gsm card not the 100gsm paper behind it.
Every now and then it slows, and goes "calm...down...calm....down..." 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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For a wallpaper[^]
The first time I saw this on a notebook in Ebay, I literally cursed the seller for selling a notebook for such a high price, even when the screen is TOTALLY DAMAGED. 
Can't the MS folks pick one good, worthy poster from the million good "Webshots"? Hope you remember that popular, cool wallpaper-app of the 2000s.
Starting to think people post kid pics in their profiles because that was the last time they were cute - Jeremy Falcon.
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That wallpaper is one that lets you arrange your icons on the darker areas in the image thus making them far more visible.
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Nish Nishant wrote: That wallpaper is one that lets you arrange your icons on the darker areas in the image thus making them far more visible.
Pics of intergalactic space interspersed with a few gravity lensed galaxies is good for that too. 
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I would agree. 
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I have a picture of Mrs Wife standing in the middle of the Sahara*, all the edges are a nice calm sand colour.
* I have let her back
veni bibi saltavi
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There are so many better pics, that could still do it! This one looked so weird to me. I've been dealing with ruined LCD panels lately on my displays and tablets. You would know why I dislike it now! :P
Starting to think people post kid pics in their profiles because that was the last time they were cute - Jeremy Falcon.
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I don't see any issue here. If you don't like the lock screen's picture, what prevents you from changing it?
That's like ranting about a car because the default radio station is not one of your favorites
"I'm neither for nor against, on the contrary." John Middle
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Have you watched House Hunters on HGTV? "Oh, so this house is 20K under budget, has the desired number of bedrooms and pretty much every other feature we wanted and more, but the powder room's paint color is one shade darker than we prefer. Rejected, next house please." Reminded me of that.
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I must confess, I usually avoid watching this kind of crappy TV shows. Now, I know why Thanks
"I'm neither for nor against, on the contrary." John Middle
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sacrilege! you should never change windows settings, microsoft knows and has set what is best.
Installing Signature...
Do not switch off your computer.
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Lopatir wrote: microsoft knows and has set what is best
Except for updates
"I'm neither for nor against, on the contrary." John Middle
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For the first time I looked at it in my own PC, it was a shocker, it exactly looked like a broken display. I was having a bad time with so many of my machines/hardwares. So it did upset me for a second. Hehe. Microsoft is answerable. At least that lady, Cortana is.
Starting to think people post kid pics in their profiles because that was the last time they were cute - Jeremy Falcon.
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"Some settings are managed by your organization."
I'd rather they "managed" to at least put a corporate logo there. 
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Reporting errors in queries.
I have a stored proc with two merge statements. SQL Server was showing the "can't update the same row twice", but was reporting the error on the first line of the stored proc (which was not where the first merge statement started).
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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The 2016 version of Management studio is supposed to have fixed a lot of these error line number discrepancies.
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That have to do more than fix the reported line number. If they know there's an error, they can be a lot more detailed about what's causing the problem. In this day and age, reporting a "syntax error near ')'" is bullsh|t of the highest order.
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
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You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
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When you pry the gun from my cold dead hands, be careful - the barrel will be very hot. - JSOP, 2013
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Amen brother, spun my wheels yesterday on a similar issue. We are using JDBC Batch Update functionality talking to SQL Server and the stack trace gave me "incorrect syntax near where". I had to go monkey down in the bowels of our code to get the SQL string to output so I could see this "where".
Cutting to the chase, the code sets a source SQL query then you tell it which columns from the source match which columns of the destination and in a little black box it creates Insert and Updates statements.
Unless right after you set the source SQL query to immediately do a get of the same string for debugging purposes because that somehow wipes out the column information even before you add it.
 But I removed my debugging line and everything is hunky dory now.
Same but different, thanks for letting me vent.
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Charles Manson dead at 83 - ![Jig | [Dance]](https://www.codeproject.com/script/Forums/Images/jig.gif) - no roses for that one.
| Ravings en masse^ |
|---|
| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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Well, two dead great SOBs in 4 days... I like this week!
GCS d-- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L+@ E-- W++ N+ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t+ 5? X R+++ tv-- b+(+++) DI+++ D++ G e++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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Salvatore Riina[^]. He had so many people killed that Manson pales in comparison. And the power he had, and still has...
GCS d-- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L+@ E-- W++ N+ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t+ 5? X R+++ tv-- b+(+++) DI+++ D++ G e++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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Perhaps you ought to request an animated :tarantella: emoticon for such occasions?
| Ravings en masse^ |
|---|
| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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I prefer the :quadriglia:
GCS d-- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L+@ E-- W++ N+ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t+ 5? X R+++ tv-- b+(+++) DI+++ D++ G e++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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