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I'm one that believes retirement is overrated,
but I still can't get past the idea that old people are pretty much youthless.
Sin tack ear lol
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If you lose something in an old-age home, don't stop until you've searched every nook and granny.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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On that you know that the face-palm was invented by an old person ...
... first place to check when you can't see your glasses. (If you can remember though).
Sin tack ear lol
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I'm thankful you didn't say "nook in granny".
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Let's all pretend you didn't say that either, eh? 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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By the third day of a 3 day weekend I start to go nuts.
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But it's the time when you can spend all day coding things you want to code and learning languages that have no use whatsoever. Just make sure that your room is the one furthest from the kitchen. She will make the journey a couple of times a day with a cup of your favourite but the journey's really just to make sure you're still alive.
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Is it wrong to hate a certain race?
Because I don't mind doing a 5K but my running group wants to do a 10K and I really don't like them.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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I personally hate "grand national" because usually some horses will be damaged  On the other Hand it is a fantastic race 
modified 19-Jan-21 21:04pm.
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Well I won't say "hate", but I think this is a particularly stupid race.
Sin tack ear lol
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I hate all races... Black, Asia... *cough cough* I mean, 100m, 500m... 
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I hate all races... Black, Asia... *cough cough* I mean, 100m, 500m...
[Edit]
Apparently, this joke is so hilarious that CP decided to post it twice (because I really didn't) 
[/Edit]
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Is this "Unthought Thought of The Day"?
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Meetings 
If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time - a tremendous whack.
--Winston Churchill
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Scott Adams (and Dilbert in general) has become angrier and angrier over the years. It used to be an amusing comic but I'm finding it just leaves me feeling deflated and unamused after reading it these days.
cheers
Chris Maunder
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Garfield[^]
Skipper: We'll fix it.
Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
Skipper: Grit, spit and a whole lotta duct tape.
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Garfield drinks coffee.
Garfield loves pizza.
He's half way to being a coder.
Just needs bacon and beer.
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Chris C-B wrote: Just needs bacon and beer.
Me think the only reason Garfield does not drink beer or eat bacon is that no-one ever offered to him...
Skipper: We'll fix it.
Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
Skipper: Grit, spit and a whole lotta duct tape.
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I hate coffee and beer  and I don't eat bacon.
I sure love pizza though.
I guess I'm only 1/4 coder... 1/4 DBA, 1/4 author and 1/4 nice to hang out with.
That makes me 4/4 awesome 
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You live in the land of Amstel and you don't like beer? A travesty! 
A long time ago I was stationed in Münster Westfallen, and would cross the border often to get a glass or ten of Amstel. Now, you may ask how I was able to cross the border so easily. I found it simplified matters greatly if you turned up in a tank.
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Favorite beer: Carlsburg - Goes with anything and hangovers less intense if at all.
Unfavorite beer: VB - makes me piss like a horse every pot*
Not a beer: Budweiser - No idea what it is, for sure though it's not beer.
* for non aussies: "pot" = small glass, go figure why they named a tiny cup after something much bigger; low self esteem?
Sin tack ear lol
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Lopatir wrote: Unfavorite beer: VB
Visual Basic is a beer? 
That explains a lot!
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Victoria Bitter[^]
If Anheuser-Busch would make ale, it would be a watered down version of this.
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Jörgen Andersson wrote: Anheuser-Busch
Never heard of that either
Anyway, it sounds like it would ruin my taste buds
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