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... my time has come! Everything is prepared and tomorrow I can finally go to my boss and hand him the notice. While I intend not to say or do much at all, there are others who want me to ... put some brown mass on his table or at least turn it over.
Any other bad, yet fun ideas?
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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DON'T!
You never know when you may be working for the same person some time in the future. Or he gets recruited to your new company, more than one level above you.
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You are right, but in this particular case I do not ever intend to come back, even if it means that I have to sleep under a bridge. He will also not go anywhere and is condemned to stay in his private little hell forever, which should be punishment enough.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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Still DON'T, point out all that is wrong and bugging you and the other devs as a PROFESSIONAL. Dramatically less satisfying but unless you are a petulant little brat it is the right thing to do.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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Still DON'T!
Even if everyone at your soon to be former employer who you'd be willing to work with again would cheer you for it; the story will spread via gossip to people who only know you did something unspeakable on your way out; not that your PHB was an elephanting sunshine who deserved a million times worse.
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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CDP1802 wrote: He will also not go anywhere and is condemned to stay in his private little hell forever, which should be punishment enough.
Is... is it possible??? Can there actually be someone else out there who sounds EXACTLY like someone I'm working with as well?
Let me ask you... Does this person take pride and joy in appearing to be as supremely miserable as possible in their existence, and play the "I work harder than everyone else" card while standing on the backs (and necks) of all those who report to him? With absolutely no ambition in life, except to stay exactly where he is in his self-made prison... his own martyrdom?
Just curious.
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I may add the following:
- Unlike the Pope, he is not infallible in relegious matters, but in everything he does.
- He is a master of 'delegating' work, himself doing 'the rest.
- He is a master at pushing away any responsibility, at least when something goes wrong.
- He is also a master at taking credit for it when accidentally something works.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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I can say, with all reasonable certainty, that you and I do not work for the same company. Yet, by all accounts, I would find it hard to believe this is not the same individual. You have described him to the very letter.
I congratulate you on your move forward, and because I know firsthand the sheer frustration of what you've been going through during your time there - I am happy for you.
It can be oh-so-tempting to burn that bridge and stand on the other side of the valley laughing maniacally, but as others have said... refrain. You'll be much happier having taken the high road out of that place. It also will do absolutely no good to try to knock that person down a few pegs on your way out. Just do what I do - henceforth, refer to that individual as "The Teflon Don" - since nothing sticks to them anyway.
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That sounds like a generic description of middle management.
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Why would you want to do that? As a professional, you should let the current employers know why are you leaving them (the real reason, whatever it is). Then, you can also say, if the issues I mentioned were fixed, I might come back and be happy here.
On a lighter note, you might plan a funeral of your employee ID and invite those concerned.
"You'd have to be a floating database guru clad in a white toga and ghandi level of sereneness to fix this goddamn clusterfuck.", BruceN[ ^]
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It's simply time to move on. He is not interested in fixing anything, otherwise he would already have done something in the last 20 years. I don't intend to argue with him about how to run this place, but nobody says I must stay end endure it any longer.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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I wish you well in your new life !
Bill
«Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn.» Benjamin Franklin
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Thanks.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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I think being cold and harsh is enough. The deks turning point is well past now, since you're leaving so no need to get enraged. Pranks and similar are never good, you're a responsible adult AND you're leaving... why bother?
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
"When you have eliminated the JavaScript, whatever remains must be an empty page." -- Mike Hankey
"just eat it, eat it"."They're out to mold, better eat while you can" -- HobbyProggy
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I don't really intend to do anything except to hand over that piece of paper. There are a few more people here who are still looking for a way out. They are happy for everyone who finally comes so far, but they also know that things become another notch worse for them. Some silly ideas what to do when you finally manage to escape are ok, if they make them feel a little better.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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Well then, bind the boss, soak everything in gasoline, leave him a saw to free himeself and set everything alight. then walk out not looking back while lighting a cigarette from the burning office (even if you don't smoke.). 
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- ++>+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
If you think 'goto' is evil, try writing an Assembly program without JMP. -- TNCaver
"When you have eliminated the JavaScript, whatever remains must be an empty page." -- Mike Hankey
"just eat it, eat it"."They're out to mold, better eat while you can" -- HobbyProggy
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My first employer had some interesting tasks to do from this[^] perspective. 
The handcuff would be attached to one of the fins, keeping him nice and warm in the rocket's exhaust while he is on his way to the stratosphere.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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But then I would have to wait until I win a lottery...
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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I can think of plenty of fun ideas. The problem is that most of them would get you punched in the face, sued, or worse. I've often had the fantasy of quitting my job in such a "creative" manner, but so far (35 years and counting), sanity has prevailed. 
The best way to handle this is in a professional manner. While you may think that you will never work for (or with) your current boss again, "Never" is a long time. You also don't want to ruin your reputation in the field.
If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time - a tremendous whack.
--Winston Churchill
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I would love to be Homer while I am at the job and become Bart for my last day.
"You'd have to be a floating database guru clad in a white toga and ghandi level of sereneness to fix this goddamn clusterfuck.", BruceN[ ^]
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All the best for your new career.
Over the years, I've realized two things - In professional life there are no permanent friends or foes. And the world is indeed round.
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As others have said, be the adult, keep it civil.
When I turned in my notice at my last position, the manager said, "I don't understand..."
Blah, blah, blah...
I never thought she'd leave, either, but, a few years later, she left and is now working in the building next to me; different company, but who knows what may happen?
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CDP1802 wrote: Any other bad, yet fun ideas?
Many, but as others said, Don't.
The worst thing you can do to your boss is a big silly smile from ear to ear showing him how happy you are to leave.
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