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Movie Quote Of The Day
Well, now that the day's almost over, is it reasonable of me to ask you if you'll both join me in my room?
Which movie?
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Oh, come on, I thought we'd settled that.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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The Rock[^] : Hard in pants
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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Sounds like it includes both Paris AND Nicky this time... 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Dolly and baa lamb do Wales
Every day, thousands of innocent plants are killed by vegetarians.
Help end the violence EAT BACON
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The Godfather
They surely can join anyone in its own room.
Geek code v 3.12
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- r++>+++ y+++*
Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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So can Superglue!
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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That works only on fingers.
Geek code v 3.12
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- r++>+++ y+++*
Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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Try using it instead of Vaseline then...
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Not really. After about 15 minutes it just peels off the skin and the fingers are free again. Just don't panic and wait. And no, that's not an invitation to be careless and get that stuff on more sensitive parts like eyelids or (god forbid!) any more private parts.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
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That works, if you didn't stick your fingers together or to other material. As I did...
Geek code v 3.12
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- r++>+++ y+++*
Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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It should always work with a little patience. It's the oily stuff secreted by your skin which you leave as fingerprints. After some time there is enough of that stuff under the glue to nullify its cohesion to the skin.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
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Die Hard without a vengeance
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One of my completely infantile colleagues has bought himself a new batch of firecrackers, the pull string type[^] (I don't know the correct technical term for them)... So now things are exploding left and right.
He's taped them to chairs so that they explode when you pull out the chairs. Also to most doors and drawers in the building.
I was lucky and "disarmed" the one under my chair (see link above), but others have had less luck, and so far 4 people have bought it. The whole building is smelling of burnt powder!
The other day, an innocent and unsuspecting cleaning lady was the victim of one as well...
Has anybody else got "jokers" in their office???
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-----
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Does a whoops i broke the network joker count aswell?
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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I have two. Two completely reasonable people, when took singularly. When they both are in the office though (90% of time, and it is an open space)... It's 3 years I'm using all of my resources to try to not kill either one of them.
Geek code v 3.12
GCS d--- s-/++ a- C++++ U+++ P- L- E-- W++ N++ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t++ 5? X R++ tv-- b+ DI+++ D++ G e++>+++ h--- r++>+++ y+++*
Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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I also have two. The other one is a little more nerdy.
I HATE the standard whistling Samsung "you've got text message" sound SO MUCH! So every time he gets a text message (and I hear the sound), I yell at him to turn off his friggin volume when he's at work (of course he doesn't)
So just to annoy me, he built a setup with a Raspberry Pi, a speaker and a motion detection sensor (to detect if I was sitting in my chair), and hid it under the roof plate just above my head. There it would sit and play the "Text message" sound at random intervals.
I never imagined such an elaborate setup, so I assumed that he had somehow gotten access to my computer and installed some kind of malware. I went through every single file on the computer, but didn't find anything.
It took me two friggin days before I noticed a piece of scotch tape above my head holding the sensor (the rest was well hidden). I was completely going out of my mind.
Like with you, the two jokers normally go at each other, but it seems like the rest of us are now to be included in the festivities... 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-----
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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A few years ago one of my coworkers hid a noise maker between someone's cube wall and the building wall for several months. No motion detector though, it was manually triggered by a wired button from a few cubes down the hall.
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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LOL 
BTW: I've got myself one of these[^], so the next joker that messes with me gets to taste that... I've tested it on my own computer, and it works like a charm! 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-----
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Yes, the occasional practical joke keeps things fun  But you have to be careful who you prank, some of the guys always retaliate and escalate and won't stop if they aren't the winner. We have rules that we don't do anything harmful either.
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Based on title alone, I thought the post was going to be about the runs. Glad it wasn't.
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No, in that case, it would have been "It's been a shìtty morning..." 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-----
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Many, many years ago, one of my colleagues was in the Territorial Army and was away from work for a week, during which time we completely sabotaged his desk...
Clingfilm stuff over the phone dial (it was a real rotary phone dial)
Mouthpiece of phone off, cardboard in, back together - many shouted conversations of fun!
Removed the arms from his chair and stuck on with tape - so they lasted having the chair moved, but not when he leant on them to sit.
Put his in/out trays on pencils (the round type) and a piece of string from teh back of them, to the back of his draw - pull out the draw and the in tray went everywhere.
the two pieces of resistance, as they say:
Sent a telegram saying our pools syndicate had won (it had - we won about three pounds from memory) several thousand pounds each
With the help of the HR department, faked his payslip to have an additional week's pay instead of taking a week's pay off!
Oh! the fun when he bought the drinks on his windfalls!
PooperPig - Coming Soon
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There's a lot of good stuff in there. Too bad that it can't be used nowadays with cell phones and paperless offices... 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-----
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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yeah - about the funniest thing these days is changing someone's phone language.
PooperPig - Coming Soon
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