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The Heart of Gold, obviously.
It just has to change probability levels to be anywhere it has to be, at that many miles per millionth of a second.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Well, I don't think the Lexx wins a prize for its speed, but it can reproduce, how cool is that?!
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The Soul is the fastest spaceship: it is so much faster than light it arrives before you were born, and you can only see shadows of it in the dance of neuronal excitation in synaptic networks in the neocortical part of the analog wetware computer running the Primate Operating System (aka "feed, mate, reproduce, horde, dominate, destroy, enslave, rationalize, regress, project, deny") version Alpha circa 100k BCE located in what said Primates call, euphemistically "the head."
«I'm asked why doesn't C# implement feature X all the time. The answer's always the same: because no one ever designed, specified, implemented, tested, documented, shipped that feature. All six of those things are necessary to make a feature happen. They all cost huge amounts of time, effort and money.» Eric Lippert, Microsoft, 2009
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Hold on!
I am writing a book with the fastest ever spaceship in it!
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I recall that the Bistromathic Drive[^] in the ship owned by Slartibartfast was faster than the heart of gold. Indeed, I'm sure the IID is referred to as an electric pram!
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Probably the ships used by the Spacing Guild in Dune. The navigators were able to "fold" space which had the effect of instantaneous transportation across the galaxy - even faster than the hyperspace travel in Star Wars which took some amount of time.
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Except that that's the exact same technique used in Star Trek's warp drive (the clue's kinda in the name!)
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I really don't think you've thought this through! For any ship travelling faster than light the notion of fastest is entirely meaningless because of relativity. In fact, arriving before you left is the only possibility with faster than light travel, and the faster you go, the earlier you arrive. So, although you get to the place you want to go in seconds (from the crew's point of view) you then have to wait an age to catch up to when you wanted to be there. It is a genuine example of more haste, less speed.
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I recall reading a short sci-fi story some time ago that had FTL transportation, but not FTL communication. The main kicker of that being that you could arrive at a distant planet, but everyone there would ignore you until light from your originating location was able to catch up. It was a silly premise, but it was intriguing as well.
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The DeLorean can travel in the time (and I suppose space).
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The fastest must surely be the Heart of Gold in Hitch-hiker's Guide to the Galaxy since, with the help of its improbability drive (which is powered by a cup of tea in the Brownian motion producer) it could pass through every point in every universe simultaneously.
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Person me = GetMe();
while(!me.Awake)
{
if(!CaffeinatedDrink.HaveAny) throw new CannotWakeUpException(me, CannotWakeUpReasons.NoCaffeine);
me.Drink(CaffeinatedDrink.Get(DrinkType.Random | DrinkType.FromFavoriteList));
}
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
---
The metaphorical solid rear-end expulsions have impacted the metaphorical motorized bladed rotating air movement mechanism.
---
Do questions with multiple question marks annoy you???
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This is very poor code. What if an infinitevery large supply of caffeinated drinks exists, but me.Awake never returns true?
You should at the very least throw a BustedBladderException 
If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time - a tremendous whack.
--Winston Churchill
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Yeah, there is room for further enhancements, but I am too lazy to do so right now (along with having some rather unpredictable internet access)
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
---
The metaphorical solid rear-end expulsions have impacted the metaphorical motorized bladed rotating air movement mechanism.
---
Do questions with multiple question marks annoy you???
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And hey, what's the problem if a few Person objects explode and die?
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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possible null reference exception, line 1.
edit: actually, it would occur on your (!me.awake)
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http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twenty_Five_(album)[^]
If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time - a tremendous whack.
--Winston Churchill
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XKCD #25[^]
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
---
The metaphorical solid rear-end expulsions have impacted the metaphorical motorized bladed rotating air movement mechanism.
---
Do questions with multiple question marks annoy you???
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Brisingr Aerowing wrote: Do questions with multiple question marks annoy you???
Yes!!!! 
There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
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Oh really??? 
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
---
The metaphorical solid rear-end expulsions have impacted the metaphorical motorized bladed rotating air movement mechanism.
---
Do questions with multiple question marks annoy you???
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24[^]
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
---
The metaphorical solid rear-end expulsions have impacted the metaphorical motorized bladed rotating air movement mechanism.
---
Do questions with multiple question marks annoy you???
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Dammit Chloe!
- I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
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10^24
The number of times Jack says "damn it".
What we got here is a failure to communicate
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23 Enigma[^]
Also
23 The Movie[^] (Based on a true story, about hackers)
What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
---
The metaphorical solid rear-end expulsions have impacted the metaphorical motorized bladed rotating air movement mechanism.
---
Do questions with multiple question marks annoy you???
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