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So I left the house this morning to drop the kids to school, running late so decided to take the Car. Except the car wasn't where I normally park it. Checked the other two places I sometimes park when my usual space is not available. Nothing. Bollocks. So I go back to the house to tell the Missus and ask her to check that I'm not going doolally. She does a circle of the house and confirms the Car has definitely gone. sh*t.
So I walk the kids to school, late. Meanwhile the Missus carries out the normal procedure in this situation, updates Facebook to tell everybody that some sunshine has stolen the car, and then phones the Police.
On my way back from the school I cut through the Co-op car park and there it is. Parked right where I left it last night when I went to the shop. 
Missus updated Facebook and then the Police to tell them the car wasn't stolen and her Boyfriends a dick. I'm just even more happier than usual that I don't have a Facebook account.
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See what happens when you park your car when you're drunk?
It was broke, so I fixed it.
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No. But I actually went there to buy beer for the Chelsea-Atletico Semi-Final. Only to get home, flick over the box to find it was actually the Bayern/Madrid Match and the Chelsea game is tonight. 
That trip to the shops was one big disaster.
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[Revised] See what happens when you park your car when you're planning to get drunk? 
It was broke, so I fixed it.
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S Houghtelin wrote: See what happens when you park your car when you're drunk?
Right. You should keep on driving until sober.
There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
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I have already lost my car. Twice actually.
First:
- Was driving the kid in town to a birthday party, and was late. I rushed into a parking silo, parked, and run with the kids to get in time at the scheduled hour (the group was to leave, so being late meant catching up the group, etc...). As we were back some four hours later : "Now, where is the car ?". 5 floors of about 1000 cars, parking layout made of 25 the same pattern !! It took me 20min to find my car back, walking through three floors of the silo with my little (and worn out) kids.  My daughter finally found the car "Here daddy, it it behind that wall". Indeed. Maybe I should have asked her right away (she was 3 at the time, so did not bother)...
Second:
- We have about six small parking lots at work, which get full (from the nearest to the farthest, guess why) progressively, but you can more or less consistently park on the same every day provided you arrive at the same hour. Was late, so did not find any empty parking spot, and finally decided to park on a visitor spot just in front of the company entrance. Did not remember when leaving work, and I actually walked past my car, then through three of the parking lots searching for my damn car. Then remembered. I do not know what had me most frustrated, the fact that I managed to completely forgot where I parked, or the (very) unneeded long walk and the fact that the car was ironically parked at the nearest possible spot.
~RaGE();
I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus
Entropy isn't what it used to.
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Sometimes I have to ride my motorbike to find out where (the fresh Hell) I've parked the car.
Veni, vidi, vici.
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I know someone who walked home from work and then when she got there remembered she had driven to work that morning so had to them walk back to work to get the car.
And a former colleague of mine would regularly forget where he had parked in our car park (it is quite large) so to avoid looking like a fool who had lost his car he would put his phone to his ear and slowly walk around looking for it, but looking as though he was dealing with a phone call before driving home. One day he was employing this tactic when the phone rang. It was his mate who worked down the road and had driven him to work that morning, he was waiting outside the main entrance to the site.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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chriselst wrote: ooking as though he was dealing with a phone call
Awesome technique !
~RaGE();
I think words like 'destiny' are a way of trying to find order where none exists. - Christian Graus
Entropy isn't what it used to.
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So...you drove to the shops to get booze, and walked home with it? Or did you drink it in store first?
Strange: I normally prefer not to carry heavy stuff home myself...
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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OriginalGriff wrote: I normally prefer not to carry heavy stuff home myself...
3 bottles of beer != heavy
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OriginalGriff wrote: I normally prefer not to carry heavy stuff home myself...
The load naturally gets lighter as you appraoch home.
It was broke, so I fixed it.
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What is a programmer?[^]
Bonus definition:
Brogrammer - n.[broh-gram-er] the one who slaps your back and then steals all the credit for your work.
[Is that how it works Pete?]
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bonus :
An organism that turns beer into software bugs.
I'd rather be phishing!
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I heard it was caffeine to software bugs, perhaps a combination of both ? 
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Don't forget chocolate and pizza !
Microsoft ... the only place where VARIANT_TRUE != true
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Veni, vidi, vici.
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.....and then puts the remains into the dust bin.... 
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If debugging is the process of removing software bugs, then programming is the act of putting them in. Therefore, a programmer is someone who creates software bugs.
Just ignore the affirming the consequent fallacy, k?
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So, what do you get when you feed this delicate organism Gin?
Upvote for the best answer.
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