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My kids have a CD with a bunch of funny songs and this is one that just played...
The Scotsman's Song
Well, a Scotsman clad in kilt once left a bar one evening fair,
And one could tell by how he walked that he'd drunk more than his share.
He fumbled 'round until he could no longer keep his feet.
Then he stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street.
Ring ding diddle iddle i de o,
Ring die diddley i o.
He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street..
About that time two young and lovely girls just happened by.
One said to the other with a twinkle in her eye.
See yon sleeping Scotsman so strong and handsome built.
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt.
Ring ding diddle iddle i de o,
Ring die diddley i o.
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt.
They crept up on that sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be,
Lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see.
And there behold for them to view beneath his Scottish skirt,
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth.
Ring ding diddle iddle i de o,
Ring die diddley i o.
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth.
They marveled for a moment and then one said we must be gone.
Let's leave a present for our friend before we move along.
As a gift they left a blue silk ribbon tied into a bow,
Around the bonnie star the Scot's kilt did lift and show.
Ring ding diddle iddle i de o,
Ring die diddley i o.
Around the bonnie star the Scot's kilt did lift and show.
Now the Scotsman woke to nature's call and stumbled toward the trees.
Behind the bush he lifts his kilt and gawks at what he sees.
And in a startled voice he says to what's before his eyes,
Oh! lad I don't know where you've been but I see you won first prize.
Ring ding diddle iddle i de o,
Ring die diddley i o.
Oh! lad I don't know where you've been but I see you won first prize.
From here[^]
If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader." - John Quincy Adams
You must accept one of two basic premises: Either we are alone in the universe, or we are not alone in the universe. And either way, the implications are staggering” - Wernher von Braun
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Bless the bonnie Scots. They've been the butt of many jokes but if it came down to it when it really counts I'd nae place my trust in any other of the four home countries that make up the UK. We hope to go to Edinburgh for New Year's Eve. I can't think of a better place to celebrate the true meaning of a New Year. If by any chance my wife should stumble upon one lying in the road I wonder if she'll have a ribbon with her.
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First Blood was very good, it kind of aged well, the other ones, not much so.
Finished most of the gift buying, finished food prep for first christmas party...
Watched code never compiles.
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hey friends,
I am a software developer having 3+ years of exp in ERP development and implementation. Which certification i should opt for that will help me grow in my career and that will add a difference to my resume??
Thanks
Varun Sareen
Varun Sareen (Dot Net Developer)
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One of these: Bronze Swimming certificate[^]
Probably won't help you get a job, but it's a certificate!
Ideological Purity is no substitute for being able to stick your thumb down a pipe to stop the water
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what kind of certificate is this?   you are simply a bad guy
Varun Sareen (Dot Net Developer)
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Keep your shirt on. He was only being funny. What OG's saying is that certifications don't matter much.
/ravi
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I'm not familiar with the software industry in India, but in North America, certification counts for very little. What does matter is how you come across in a technical interview and your software engineering experience.
Admittedly, my response is based on working at startups and early stage companies for the past dozen years, so your mileage may vary.
/ravi
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thanks
Varun Sareen (Dot Net Developer)
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If you are based in India, you may get more answers if you ask in The General Indian Topics Forum[^].
The overwhelming majority of visitors here are not from the Sub-Continent and would therefore be less able to help.
Henry Minute
Do not read medical books! You could die of a misprint. - Mark Twain
Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?"
“I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.”
I wouldn't let CG touch my Abacus!
When you're wrestling a gorilla, you don't stop when you're tired, you stop when the gorilla is.
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The quality of your code is your certification. Your ability to learn is your certification. Microsoft cannot bestow these things on you.
".45 ACP - because shooting twice is just silly" - JSOP, 2010
-----
You can never have too much ammo - unless you're swimming, or on fire. - JSOP, 2010
-----
"Why don't you tie a kerosene-soaked rag around your ankles so the ants won't climb up and eat your candy ass." - Dale Earnhardt, 1997
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Make up your own. Something like CERP3+.
Nobody gives a sh!t.
Indians are overly impressed with degrees, certifications, etc. I guess it is yet another filter for the lazy recruiter.
Of course, it must be said that when the recruiter is overwhelmed with 8 million resumes all saying the same thing (I graduated last week with a B. Tech. and have 3 years experience in Oracle implementation), he has to have some filter.
Note that the recruiter is incapable of understanding that when someone is a fulltime student, he is not likely to have accumulated any experience in anything, including learning Computer Science. 
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I doubt certification means much, especially as there are now websites where you pay, and they take the test in your name... - 2005[^]
Sorry, I think it's a total waste of time... - 2006[^]
This is why Microsoft certification is a waste of time, and meaningless... - 2006[^]
I've totally seen certification centres that will take the test in your name, and guarentee you will pass. How this is of value to anyone, is beyond me. - 2006[^]
Certifications are a joke, they are a waste of time. They prove nothing, apart from a willingness to pay for a test over and over, until you pass it. - 2007[^]
Yes, it's overpriced. Certification is useless, IMO. Certainly any certification that's free, is useless. - 2007[^]
See, this is why I would never bother with MS certifications, or hire anyone who had one, and thought it meant anything. - 2007[^]
See, it's because of people like you that certifications are worthless. Just say I had these answers and sent them to you. Do you think you can go into an interview with that certificate, but have no idea how to pass the test ( i.e. not know how to write web apps with C# ) and get a job ? - 2007[^]
This is why certifications are useless - 2007[^]
I think all exams are a waste of time. If someone wouldn't hire me b/c I don't have one, they have failed my exam. - 2008[^]
I thnk you mean you want to pass one ? That's easy, the web is full of guides. That's why those exams are worthless. - 2008[^]
I got an email once from someone who offered any Microsoft certification. They were a testing centre, so they would sit the exam in your name. - 2008[^]
certification is a joke. I am astounded that anyone still cares, MS must spend a lot on studies and articles like this one. - 2008[^]
Certification is a joke. I would say as much in my interviews. People can buy it without knowing anything. Prove that you know your stuff, that should be all you need to do. - 2009[^]
You really think that an employer won't work out that you have no idea about ASP.NET and just used 'dumps' to cheat on the exams ? This is why exams are useless. - 2009[^]
You know, any company worth working for, knows these things are useless and can quickly tell in interviews between programmers and people who got a certification by reading dumps - 2009[^]
You're not seriously going to do these ? - 2009[^]
MS certifications are easy to buy, that part does not surprise me at all. - 2010[^]
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Another great voice silenced, according to Wikipedia. ![Rose | [Rose]](https://codeproject.freetls.fastly.net/script/Forums/Images/rose.gif)
It is an absolute certainty that there are no certainties. ~ Christopher Hitchens 1949-2011
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Oh God! Has the Dalek been updating wiki again?
Ideological Purity is no substitute for being able to stick your thumb down a pipe to stop the water
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............. and came back with this[^] for me. Mine, all mine.
Henry Minute
Do not read medical books! You could die of a misprint. - Mark Twain
Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?"
“I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.”
I wouldn't let CG touch my Abacus!
When you're wrestling a gorilla, you don't stop when you're tired, you stop when the gorilla is.
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Who ate all the pies
------------------------------------
I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave
CCC Link[ ^]
Trolls[ ^]
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Is that a box of nappies (diapers) I see? 
It is an absolute certainty that there are no certainties. ~ Christopher Hitchens 1949-2011
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Well, Henry is getting on.
------------------------------------
I will never again mention that I was the poster of the One Millionth Lounge Post, nor that it was complete drivel. Dalek Dave
CCC Link[ ^]
Trolls[ ^]
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Gentlemen's televisual leisure wear, if you don't mind.
But no, they weren't those either, just some new tea-cloths.
Henry Minute
Do not read medical books! You could die of a misprint. - Mark Twain
Girl: (staring) "Why do you need an icy cucumber?"
“I want to report a fraud. The government is lying to us all.”
I wouldn't let CG touch my Abacus!
When you're wrestling a gorilla, you don't stop when you're tired, you stop when the gorilla is.
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to all the people who responded to my 'contracting is like whoring' post a few days back.
Your responses really did make sense, and meant a lot to me, and have actualy helped me resolve my feelings regarding a recent contract that despite going well technically, I delivered 100% of what was wanted, yet left a sour taste in my mouth.
This was indicated by my leavingv email, not one person form the team I worked with replied (I spent the last 3 months of the contract working from home, so was out of the office). In comparison, a sister office sent back a number of 'thanks and good luck for the future' replys.
I hate it when people dont like me, I mean in the flesh, I know on CP I like to liven things up a bit, by adopting a certain position, but in the flesh I am actually fiarly agreable, and to feel so resented by the people I worked with for almlst 2 years was disturbing, but your words have salved my pain, thanks! 
==============================
Nothing to say.
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Hope all CPians in the Philippines and their families are OK.
/ravi
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I noticed on the news things didn't look too clever over there at the moment...........and here we are moaning that it is a little chilly the last few days. 
modified 17-Dec-11 13:00pm.
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