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Innocent ?
Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “Wow! What a Ride!" - Hunter S Thompson - RIP
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Well that was quick. YAUM!
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Nice clue 
Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “Wow! What a Ride!" - Hunter S Thompson - RIP
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I worked my elephant off since I was 8 years old perfecting my craft. It took me awhile but I'm no longer afraid to say I'm good at it, maybe even great at it - at least sometimes. Or at least if I listen to people I work with.
When people talk about "what they do" I don't think most mean what I mean. I was born for it. And I trained from a young age. Even without the former, anyone who did the latter would be good at whatever they set out to do by adulthood.
I put my pants on one leg at a time. I'm an idiot in some areas of life, but I specialized. I'm not ashamed of that. I'm glad I did. I think with over 8 billion people out there we could do with a lot of specialists. There's plenty of division of labor to go around.
I love what I do. I've hated it at points past, and even tried to leave the dev field which I did for some years, but it's in my blood and I can't stay away.
And now that I make little machines, it's next leveling everything. So much fun.
I'm blessed, but at the same time I worked insanely hard for a very long time to get to this point.
I still get imposter syndrome, but I've let myself come to believe the above more than superficially.
It's about time, decades in.  It has just been over the past few years or so with this new spate of work (I wasn't working in the field prior to that, I actually got scouted *here*) that I've really looked at my entire body of work and decided I'm genuinely pleased with the things I make.
I recently had someone I'm working with tell me he's never been as far ahead on a software project as we are now. (I'm the primary on that)
But this is how I work. I frontload everything due to anxiety and then dramatically outperform everyone's estimates, including my own. I can back off, but then it impacts me emotionally having deadlines hanging out there, and I'd have to take a lot more money to make that worth it. Either that or I frontload the work, don't tell anyone, and then feel dishonest doling it out bit by bit. I don't care for that either. What I've found works well, despite the danger in it in terms of people's expectations. Besides, even if I'm "busy" I barely work part time as it is. I work 2 hours a day probably is my average on a standard project, and even I've found, on the project I was initially sweating. I just get a lot done, which is good, because I've otherwise got disabilities that get in the way of me working more than I do.
This field has saved me - allowed me to continue working when the wiring in the walls of my head is so screwy I can't even interview anymore. Software development might be the great equalizer. I have some serious mental health conditions, and If you knew my educational background it would probably surprise you. Yet here I am, not just able to function, but to excel at what I do. I am so grateful.
Anyway, maybe I'll start estimating better now that I see myself more clearly in terms of development, but I like being ahead of the game, and I prefer being underestimated to overestimated, even when I'm the one doing it.
I'm not saying any of this to brag. In fact I feel somewhat uncomfortable writing it, but I'm just being honest. 
To err is human. Fortune favors the monsters.
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I think programming saved the day for me as well.
Once I got a taste, I knew this what I like and do best.
If I don't do it regularly I get withdrawal.
I am retired so I don't have to do it for money, but I still do it.
I was not nor am I as intense as you, though.
You say you know you are good at what you do. That's a good thing.
I know you know what you are doing, but that is not always enough.
You need a way to temper the intensity or it will break you.
One of my favorite jokes
I didn't think that orthopedic shoes would help, but I stand corrected.
"A little time, a little trouble, your better day"
Badfinger
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At a young age i only thought of physics . One of my pet theories of which were several was if i looked through a strong enough telescope i would see my behind . One of the reasons i am not a physicist is i went to school for it . In order to make a point i once asked my parents while we were in motion in car "Are we going forwards or is the world going backwards?" "Zamkni buzię" was the reply . As for another theory if i followed Einstein's dictum "Imagination is more important than knowledge." I might have invented virtual particles . As for recent great thoughts i have a pet theory if correct makes it easy to deduce black holes evaporate and another pet theory if correct would have changed history as even Isaac Newton should have utilized it to deduce Special Relativity this one i can determine if correct via some simple calculations but i have yet to get around to it. i have no great thoughts re/ Software other than it should be pretty .
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When you say you work only a few hours a day, I think you are neglecting all of the background work your brain is doing 24x7 before you sit down to capture it.
My brain is always working on the backlog…
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That's true to an extent, but I also take lots of naps because I'm compelled to sleep after I eat, no matter what I eat or the portions. It's kinda miserable, but my point is I'm certainly not working then.
I do take a lot of downtime, and I am doing "background work" for some of it but I can't really bill for that in good faith. That's more on me for allowing myself to think about work when I'm not working, but I can't really help it all the time because I have a many track mind and it's flighty. 
To err is human. Fortune favors the monsters.
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I have used cat naps a few times to help reach a solution when working on intense algorithms.
- Load my brain with all of the “knowns” and failed/eliminated approaches. (Getting very sleepy from overload)
- Take a 20 minute nap.
- Wake up and dive into the coding that will be a definite improvement over the last attempt.
Some of the solutions were quite intense and waayyy longer for a single method than I ever like to write. I remember one such method that works extremely well. I could not find a good place to break it into pieces after multiple reviews. Eventually, it was obsoleted after 10+ years in use.
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I changed the way I coded around 2017 because the wiring in my brain changed, and I think about problems differently now.
I don't break them down like I used to - I tend to solve them more holistically, and as a result I end up with longer functions - but that serves me in other ways due to short term memory issues related to what I mentioned.
I don't think most of my code these days would survive review, as clean as I make my work stuff.
I hate to say it, but it's not intelligible enough in that it doesn't reduce problems to small components with lower cognitive load. I tend tackle it all at once, and in some ways, the code can function better that way, but even if it does, it's at the expense of readability/comprehendibility. 
To err is human. Fortune favors the monsters.
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Or it might be the only way it can function. Some of your projects have very tight constraints!
Enterprise software in the era of 64 bit runtimes and 512GB of memory:
Just increase the heap to 64GB on the next run. Solved!
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Wordle 573 3/6
⬛⬛🟨⬛⬛
⬛🟨⬛⬛⬛
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
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Wordle 573 4/6
⬛⬛🟨🟨⬛
🟨🟨⬛⬛⬛
🟨⬛⬛⬛🟩
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
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Wordle 573 4/6
⬜⬜⬜⬜⬜
⬜🟨⬜⬜🟨
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🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
"A little time, a little trouble, your better day"
Badfinger
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Wordle 573 4/6
⬜🟨⬜⬜⬜
⬜⬜🟨🟨⬜
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🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
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Wordle 573 3/6*
🟨⬜⬜⬜⬜
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🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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⬜⬜🟨🟨⬜
🟨⬜🟩⬜🟩
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming “Wow! What a Ride!" - Hunter S Thompson - RIP
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Wordle 573 3/6
⬛🟨⬛⬛⬛
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🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
Yayyyy! 13 seconds AND a 3 guess.
GCS/GE d--(d) s-/+ a C+++ U+++ P-- L+@ E-- W+++ N+ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE Y+ PGP t+ 5? X R+++ tv-- b+(+++) DI+++ D++ G e++ h--- r+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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Wordle 573 3/6
🟨⬜⬜⬜🟨
⬜🟨🟨⬜🟨
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 
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Wordle 573 4/6
🟨⬜⬜⬜⬜
⬜🟩⬜🟨⬜
⬜🟨⬜🟨⬜
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
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Wordle 573 3/6
🟨⬜⬜⬜🟨
🟨🟩⬜🟩⬜
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
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Wordle 573 4/6*
⬜⬜⬜🟩⬜
⬜⬜⬜🟩⬜
⬜🟩🟩🟩⬜
🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩
Happiness will never come to those who fail to appreciate what they already have. -Anon
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Wordle 573 4/6
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Get me coffee and no one gets hurt!
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So, I've been unable to print to my HP printer. If you go back and find a past post, I technically failed and acquired a printer that requires it to call home to HP. Now, why it needs to call home, I can only surmise it wants to let HP know if I need more toner (looking on my shelf with a cartridge sitting there). It's been sitting in my office blinking with an error light. Well an exclamation point. I just put in new toner, the paper is in it, I can ping the printer so I know it's on the network.
Apparently there is some elephanting level of bullshit in the printer that disables the device if it cannot reach home. Deadman timer or some such thing. I bumble around the buttons and it finally prints me a page - simply by providence - can't phone home. The HP Stupid s/w won't install on my laptop and there is nothing to give me a hint as to what the problem is.
After fighting for an hour, I took the time to say f it and bought a brother printer. But it's installation process is looking for a WIPS code (I want wireless - too many cables already) and I have not been able to find it.
Grab your popcorn and stay tuned. John, I need a full clip of ACP for the HP. Office Space - Printer Scene (UNCENSORED) - YouTube[^]
Update: Finally just went around the s/w installation, assigned a static IP and everyone is happy. I have an amplifi mesh network in my house, so had to figure out how to turn on WPS. I know that this is supposed to simplify things, but I don't see how.
Anyway, out with the trash.
Charlie Gilley
“They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759
Has never been more appropriate.
modified 13-Jan-23 6:49am.
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