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Mark C. Wallace @ pm.stackexchange.com[^] Quote:

There is no change request for the prior lightbulb; the change from "lit" to "dark" was not authorized.

I have tasked the team from seven parallel lines to perform an root cause analysis and produce an Ishikawa diagram. They have had to replace the lead tech who apparently tried to assault the project manager with a chair.

A second team has been authorized to review our process diagrams to determine who authorized the light bulb to go dark. They have outlined a comprehensive strategy that will incorporate both a historical analysis of the light/dark status of similar light bulbs, consultation with internal and external industry experts on lightbulb behavior and a validation of the Mean Time Between Failure(MTBF) ratings of the light bulbs.

A third team has begun an Analysis of Alternatives for the replacement light bulb; they report that by the end of the week they will have identified the relative power and influence of the Compact Florescent lobby and the LED lobby. Although there is general recognition of the superior energy consumption profile of the LED, there have been some concerns about the ability of the supply chain to support our goals for sustainability and the committee on empowering the differently abled has requested a study of the impact of the blue tint of the LED's on the ability of potential colorblind employees.

A fourth team proactively began working on the SWOT analysis required for the charter which will authorize a project manager who will have the authority to produce the rest of the project documentation and to request that line management assign staff with the requisite technical skills needed to execute the resulting work package(s).

A fifth team has also proactively loaded a preliminary risk registry with some very pertinent questions about the required ladder. There appears to be some very good research that will help to quantify the relationship between the difference between the optimal ladder size and the actual ladder size on the probability and severity of resulting injuries. While I am pleased that they were proactive about the task, they are being counselled because the preliminary risk registry is not based on the authorized Organizational Process Assets. Once the risk registry has been proven to be aligned with organizational best practices, the team will return to developing risk triggers and mitigation plans.

A sixth team is charged with an analysis of the resources used in this project, and the development of an equivalency table that will enable us to evaluate each employee on the basis of Knowledge, Skills, and Abilities, and use those evaluations to develop a unit of measurement the "project manager equivalent(PME)" which can be used to support the Key Performance Indicator. The early estimates are that the answer will be in the 7.5 to 13.2 deca PME. The manager has already begun the process of submitting the PME to the international standards organization.

I had intended the seventh team (supply chain management), to begin work yesterday. They reported a delay because they had to run down to the 7-11 to buy a light bulb.

As a final note I'd like to find who underlined the words "The Project Manager" in my PMBOK and wrote "singular noun marker; the answer is 'one'" in my PMBOK.