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The tablet was version 1.0 - simplicity
If it's not broken, fix it until it is
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Ah! So you mean those are the Beta Test Commandments? Explains a lot...
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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They didn't pass UAT
If it's not broken, fix it until it is
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Yup, and when they closed automatically, you had to move fast, or they'd have your fingers off.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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The first set was destroyed shortly after completion. 
Mongo: Mongo only pawn... in game of life.
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True, on to V2.0
If it's not broken, fix it until it is
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Kevin Marois wrote: True, on to V2.0
Cool!
How about we start with:
Thou shalt not nick thine neighbour's smartphone!
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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That is number seven
Mongo: Mongo only pawn... in game of life.
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Those?! They're just a cheap Occidental knock-off!
(The originals were written in Hebrew, and produced in the Middle East )
If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time - a tremendous whack.
--Winston Churchill
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Daniel Pfeffer wrote: Those?! They're just a cheap Occidental knock-off!
Nah, the first knock-off tablet made in China was the ipad.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Are negative numbers just depressed?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Or repressed when there's a minus strike?
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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A positive association?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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... With guys who work at negative altitude, no doubt.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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OriginalGriff wrote: Are negative numbers just depressed?
No, but the keys used to type them are.
Contrary to popular belief, nobody owes you anything.
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At their root they are imaginary so who cares what their psychological state is.
Rage against the narrative.
"To Build a Fire" - A dystopian novel about project management, and I am the dog.
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Well, its safe to say they are not THAT positive.
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No, they're being rational about it. Comes natural to those integers, I guess.
So, negative is not always depressing. Simply imagine a negative fine, that would be fine, wouldn't it? Or would you be rather the depressing kind that calls that a negative?
Bastard Programmer from Hell 
If you can't read my code, try converting it here[^]
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You positive?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Is it a thought or a question?
Life is a computer program and everyone is the programmer of his own life.
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Are you saying you never thought of a question?
Or that you don't ask your self questions? Not even "what happens if I do this?" type questions?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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I normally manage to skirt "what happens if I do that" questions quite instinctively, by engaging in a "lets see what happens when I do this" narrative; a kind of internal commentary.
No object is so beautiful that, under certain conditions, it will not look ugly. - Oscar Wilde
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Normally followed by "oops..." in my case.
Remember one where there was a problem with "valve bounce" causing bad ink dots, and I had the brilliant idea of slamming the solenoid valve open, then reversing the voltage to "soft close" it. And blew the control ICs to shrapnel with the back EMF the first time I tried it... 
Still, of the hardware is still working, you're not on the "bleeding edge" of the technology! 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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