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Looks like you got hand-tailored "premium service". 
Press F1 for help or google it.
Greetings from Germany
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Nagy Vilmos wrote: Last week I got a letter asking for a resigned declaration
They wanted you to shrug your shoulders and sigh? 
/ravi
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Give Conrad a "cheers" for me
cat fud heer
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No-one else's passports got done during that period, though.
The staff were too busy preparing for the "Thank God He's Leaving!" party.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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You can do that to some of the locals around here! (  )
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Endless fun!
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Clickety[^] (SFW) 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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It's Benedict Cumberbatch[^]!
=========================================================
I'm an optoholic - my glass is always half full of vodka.
=========================================================
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There is a certain resemblance between Mr. Cockinsnatch and the otter, I have to admit that...
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-----
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Shouldn't that have been "Udderly random video"?
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Damn, should have thought of that!
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Sean Abbott took a career-best 6-14 in the second innings of his first match since his short-pitched delivery led to the death of batsman Phillip Hughes.
I really feel that is good news, bowling is as much mental as physical and it is so pleasing to read this.
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Very much so. Good on him
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because the batters were terrified?
PooperPig - Coming Soon
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Goes without saying they were Aussies.
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Careful, in the Ashes the Stralians are ahead by 1 series and 20 matches; though to be honest they probably stole those.
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Why would an Englishman bring that up? Anyone would think you were kissing but.
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You are absolutely right, but I can't help my mind from wondering about the mental state ot the batsmen receiving the bowling! 
Life is like a s**t sandwich; the more bread you have, the less s**t you eat.
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I'm listening to Pudding Frisbee Desert Island Discs here on the Home Service. Today's guest is the Chief Guide and her latest record? Mike Read's favourite[^]
[edit - Read the DJ not Reid the inspiration for Cockney W@nker]
modified 12-Dec-14 6:02am.
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Well she is doing her best!
Dib-dib-dib!
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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I have evidently been absent from our sceptred isle for too long - don't understand !
PooperPig - Coming Soon
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Could maybe have had a different title, but I just found it amusing how Relax has gone from being banned on Radio 1 by Mike 'I Am Not a Racist' Read [helps to check the spell] to being played unedited on a mainstay of Radio 4's schedule. And by a Girl Guide too! 
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Well the spelling helps - I was thinking the comedian and wondering whether he had been caught "stuffing the choirboy with a porky sword" or something.
And don't get me on the 'singing in a foreign accent is racist' subject. Admit it! Who didn't read the crossword post below with a Welsh accent? What? Oh. Only me?
PooperPig - Coming Soon
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