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I can't help thinking that it would have been nicer to do all these things when he was alive to appreciate it.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Bugs, Microsoft? Hold worker 499! (7)
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Drink? Girls? Feck?
veni bibi saltavi
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English sentences? 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Would ya be having a cupotea? Gern, ya will! Ya will, ya will ya will...
veni bibi saltavi
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I'll not, but I'll take a drop o' Jameson or Bushmills if ya has any?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Na tha's a har one. I haves da Jammie and da Bush, but don'ts has spare.
veni bibi saltavi
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i Ram in "Windows"
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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It's an interesting confession, but it's not the answer - or even close!
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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elephant it!
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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Nope. Not that either!
Don't panic: you've got 6 minutes left...
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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I think I have the answer, but I'm on vacation tomorrow and don't want to get up early to post a clue! 
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Rat fink!
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Mantids!
Microsoft = MS
holds worker - ant
499 - ID (Roman numerals)
Bugs - mantids.
Although 499 in Roman numerals should really be CDXCIX I think...
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Well done - too late, unfortunately for me... 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Shame - if only I'd posted it a few minutes earlier...
(I really only figured it out at the last minute!)
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I thought it was a good one! 
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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From the Insider[^]
A big feature of Win 10 is saving disc space by compressing system files?
Hands up who hasn't been doing that since Win '95.
And the *New*, *Improved* recovery/restore option restores the system complete with the files that broke five minutes ago?
Because it saves a bit of disc space to give users a last-resort "FIX IT PLEASE!" option that doesn't actually fix anything?
Hands up anyone who has less than three terabytes storage.
The plot has obviously been lost, again.
Sometimes, you really can't believe what you read.
Our new big thing! Lose the thing that has rescued computers from oblivion to save enough disc space for two movies!
Hey, MS!
0. Get rid of metro!
1. Get rid of the ribbon!
2. Put the Start Menu back!
3. Restore the "save window size and position" option for Explorer., and all the little other stuff that's actually useful, but you dropped from your products in the rush to produce the worst operating system you ever made!
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Calm down! Have a drink, have two.
veni bibi saltavi
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You're telling the wrong person.
Tell it to MS. Get them to calm the **** down and stop wasting so much of their energy on stuff that is neither needed nor wanted.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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You forgot the Ranting etiquette[^] 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-----
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
modified 17-Mar-15 8:23am.
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Why are you posting links to foreign-language sites?
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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I'll be damned if I know! I'm 100% positive I copied the correct link. Guess Windows 8.1 is playing games with me. Corrected now, though... 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-----
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Nah. I'll just use the English language.
If anyone doesn't understand it: it's the Interwebs; I won't lose any sleep.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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