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I agree with you in everything but Linux. I love it, wish I knew more about it and like to play around with it from time to time.
It's a playground for me, doing something different from time to time.
To alcohol! The cause of, and solution to, all of life's problems - Homer Simpson
----
Our heads are round so our thoughts can change direction - Francis Picabia
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Linux is nice, while you do NOTHING IMPORTANT - like keeping home server with 3 html pages. Once you need to do the job, Linux converts to the time machine and EATS YOUR TIME! Not even twice I tried to make something and caught myself making everything, but the work: update libraries, install missing packages, playing with settings, forcing some device to work, etc. - it's unix way - to waste time for nothing.
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The zipper.
I hate it when it gets stuck and I have to nearly tear away half the cloth to unstuck it.
I'd rather be phishing!
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We've got a bleeder! 
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The phone on my desk - it is able to handle almost any kind of singe-/multi- conversation, but I almost unable to handle it...
I'm also terrified of fax-machines, each of them...
Skipper: We'll fix it.
Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
Skipper: Grit, spit and a whole lotta duct tape.
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I recoil in terror if my desk phone rings
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I turned the ringer off on mine years ago, been loads better ever since.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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The ringing isn't the problem, but when some-one asks me to transfer the call I'm starting to sweat...
Skipper: We'll fix it.
Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
Skipper: Grit, spit and a whole lotta duct tape.
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I just pretend to drop the handset. Transferring calls is meddling in the affairs of wizards
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I had a person call my phone at my job (once). I really don't know why I have a phone. I write code... I don't talk to people unless it is about the code... why do I have a phone?
This particular call was from an unrecognized number. I was thinking maybe it is important (this was a new job and I wasn't sure if I was expected to talk on the phone or not - it wasn't in the job description, but I wanted to do my best!)
Anyway, it was an irate customer. She kept stating she was very dissatisfied (like I could comp her bill or get someone to fix her issue). I told her she had the wrong number and I was a software developer. She insisted this was the number to call. I repeated it was not (but tried to be polite) and directed her to the customer support number on our webpage. Again, she said she had called it numerous times and was very dissatisfied. She demanded to be transferred to a VP! I didn't know any VPs at the time, and I surely didn't know how to transfer a call. And I had no idea which VP could possibly help a very dissatisfied customer who had not yet explained her problem.
Not being one to hang up I started to panic, sweat, and then I grabbed my boss. I handed him the phone and watched the whole thing play out again. Luckily, he knew how to transfer her to the customer support number on the webpage (where she had previously been very dissatisfied). Then he looked at me with large exasperated eyes and directed me to NEVER ANSWER THE PHONE AGAIN!
I said ok, because, it really isn't in my job description anyway.
modified 21-Jan-15 9:53am.
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Skipper: We'll fix it.
Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
Skipper: Grit, spit and a whole lotta duct tape.
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you can transfer a call ? 
Yup I hate phones too and practice myself in getting to know absolutely nothing about them. I went as far as press 0 for an outside line... (or 9, sometimes it´s 9, right?)
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I have a check list to do so!
1. Calm down
2. Hit the 'Transfer call' button
3. Calm down
4. Enter number
5. Calm down
6. Put down the phone
7. Calm down
Skipper: We'll fix it.
Alex: Fix it? How you gonna fix this?
Skipper: Grit, spit and a whole lotta duct tape.
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Use the Internet Help Desk method
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nL24aNugo_4[^]
Psychosis at 10
Film at 11
Those who do not remember the past, are doomed to repeat it.
Those who do not remember the past, cannot build upon it.
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I thought I was the only one. I mean I'm a software engineer but I hate the phone, any phone, mobile phones included, especially smart phone. I'm forced to carry a beeper. I never figure out how to use my desk phone until may be a year or so into any new position.
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Systems Hungarian! 
Oh technology, sorry. 
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I'm too busy having a life to actually hate a piece of software. Although, if I were to say something off the top of my head I'd imagine most things you can find on CNET are a pile of dung.
Jeremy Falcon
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a life? - i'm a programmer, never heard of one of those
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yeah, contradiction in terms 
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For a list of all the ways technology has failed to improve the quality of life, please press 3.
--Alice Kahn
If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time - a tremendous whack.
--Winston Churchill
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1) PDF - It is just such a terrible mess internally
2) Regex - this hurts my poor tiny brain
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