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A couple met at Hilton Head and fell in love. They were discussing how they would continue the relationship after their vacations were over.
"It's only fair to warn you Jody." he said. "I'm a golf nut. I live, eat, sleep and breathe golf."
"Well, since you're being honest, so will I." Jody said. "I'm a hooker."
"I see." he said. Then brightening, he smiled. "It's probably because you're not keeping your wrists straight when you hit the ball."
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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... Reminiscing perchance?
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You'd reach a bigger (and probably more appreciative) audience if you made him a rugby player.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Good thing she wasn't a slicer eh? 
New version: WinHeist Version 2.1.0 Beta
Have you ever just looked at someone and knew the wheel was turning but the hamster was dead?
Trying to understand the behavior of some people is like trying to smell the color 9.
I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours!
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Movie Quote Of The Day
License to kill gophers by the government of the United Nations. Man, free to kill gophers at will. To kill, you must know your enemy, and in this case my enemy is a varmint. And a varmint will never quit - ever. They're like the Viet Cong - Varmint Cong. So you have to fall back on superior intelligence and superior firepower. And that's all she wrote.
Which movie?
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Too hard, I'll have to look in the Tea Shed for a solution.
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You do that... I'll take a cheese sand wedge for my tea, please...
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Club or open?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Club, please - with a Slice of bacon perhaps... 
BTW - and COMPLETELY off topic: Have you ever noticed that golf is the only sport where you can say: "I really love playing with Mary even though she's the worst hooker I've ever met" - without being a complete bastard? 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Like a little roast Eagle with that? Albatross? Stormy Petrel? Onna stick?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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As far as Birdies are concerned, I think I prefer a couple of nice tits[^] - Actually, as far as that is concerned, I am often on the prowl like a Tiger in the Woods
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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My reply from yesterday's MQOTD is connected to this one today 
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James Bond in "A View to a Kill"!!!! 
Seriously: That movie is SO funny! Must see it again soon! Thanks for reminding me! 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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What's the par for this one?
Whether I think I can, or think I can't, I am always bloody right!
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CitizenFour 
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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War Stories : BBC Maintenance Vs Philip Schofield.
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JSOP and the Gopher Gun.
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Will St Andrews let women into their golf club... Can't wait to see the result
Yes or No[^]
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So, today you vote to remain in the UK or become a separate country!
I'm not going to try and influence you one way or another - I'm sure you have had the "Yes" and "No" arguments shoved down your throat even more than I have here in Wales, where it's been 50%+ of every news broadcast for a couple of weeks.
But I'd just like to say: I hope it works out for you, whichever way you decide. And that you can get back to being a single community instead of fractured into two diametrically opposed camps.
Good luck, however the result goes!
Best regards,
Paul G.
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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If the Yes camp lose they will blame us and continue to whinge about England and the English.
If they win they will blame us for everything that goes wrong in their new nation, and continue to whinge about England and the English.
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Did you not notice yesterdays news, the blame game has already started, various politicians are already coming out with their excuses. Maggie even got the blame and she's dead.
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