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Guns are safe[^]
It is the idiots holding them that are dangerous.
---------------------------------
Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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It could also be that he had a very high life insurance! 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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I nominate the guy for a Darwin award. Fine example of evolutionary process, he had spawned 3 replacements to take his place.
It was broke, so I fixed it.
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He was trying to take the lead in gun safety.
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My favorite stupid criminal story comes from the late 1990s. A man robs a convenience store; after getting the cash, he demanded a bottle of alcohol from the behind the clerk display. The clerk, probably too scared to think clearly, responded with a well-ingrained "I will have to see your ID."
The robber handed the clerk his driver's license.
The clerk returned the ID and handed him the bottle. The robber fled, and the clerk immediately wrote down what he remembered of the robber's address and phone number. With this information, the police caught the robber at home, enjoying a drink and counting the proceeds from that and two earlier robberies.
And let us not forget the numerous stories of wanna-be bank robbers who write the demand note on their own deposit slips.
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My favorite was a moron who decided to rob a gun store during normal business hours, and failed to be dissuaded by walking past the marked cop car on his way inside the store, or by the uniformed officer he walked past on his way to the counter. He whipped his gun out and became a Darwin awardee almost immediately after. 
Did you ever see history portrayed as an old man with a wise brow and pulseless heart, waging all things in the balance of reason?
Is not rather the genius of history like an eternal, imploring maiden, full of fire, with a burning heart and flaming soul, humanly warm and humanly beautiful?
--Zachris Topelius
Training a telescope on one’s own belly button will only reveal lint. You like that? You go right on staring at it. I prefer looking at galaxies.
-- Sarah Hoyt
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They're considering that, instead of charging him with Negligent Discharge, to enact and posthumously charge him with Darwinian Discharge.
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Guns don't kill people -f**kwits with guns kill people!
=========================================================
I'm an optoholic - my glass is always half full of vodka.
=========================================================
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I see Woy Hodgeson has chosen his squad for the world cup.
He's gone for Germany.
---------------------------------
Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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You're just repeating yourself[^] now, Mr Nielsen! 
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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I'm getting Reja Vu[^] for the 2018 competition as well!
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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I thought it was familiar!
---------------------------------
Obscurum per obscurius.
Ad astra per alas porci.
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur .
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I took this while leaving for work yesterday[^] (handheld phone camera, so a bit of shake noticeable)
=========================================================
I'm an optoholic - my glass is always half full of vodka.
=========================================================
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Really cool! 
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I know its a bit of a "waste of time subject" but what the hell.
Tried to message my parnter easlier with "Ok dokey" which autocorrected to "Ok donkey".... lets hope she see's the funny side eh?
Simon Lee Shugar (Software Developer)
www.simonshugar.co.uk
"If something goes by a false name, would it mean that thing is fake? False by nature?" By Gilbert Durandil
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Simon Lee Shugar wrote: "Ok donkey".... lets hope she see's the funny side eh?
I'm sure she will. Surely, she wouldn't want to make an Ass of herself???
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
-----
The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
-----
I'd just like a chance to prove that money can't make me happy.
Me, all the time
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Due to an autocorrect in a text message I had banal sex with my wife last night.
Some men are born mediocre, some men achieve mediocrity, and some men have mediocrity thrust upon them.
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Autocorrect Fails so often... and it appears always to correct into sex themes 
if(this.signature != "")
{
MessageBox.Show("This is my signature: " + Environment.NewLine + signature);
}
else
{
MessageBox.Show("404-Signature not found");
}
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When clearly it was meant to be "Banal Sax".
Those who fail to learn history are doomed to repeat it. --- George Santayana (December 16, 1863 – September 26, 1952)
Those who fail to clear history are doomed to explain it. --- OriginalGriff (February 24, 1959 – ∞)
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I thought he wanted to watch Canal Six
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'I' is nothing like 'bluewaffle'
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That mistake should last you a while.
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A few months ago I tried texting my wife "I'm hitting the road" (to indicate that I was leaving the office) and it came out "I'm hitting the torah".
This space intentionally left blank.
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