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Yesterday our beloved management released a minor restructure proposal. Nothing too major at this stage.
Now I've been working for about 35 years and at everyone of these restructures or strategy meetings they always come out with these stupid quandant graph that always have me (us) in the bottom left corner and showing we need to be in the top right corner.
Now I know I not perfect but it appears I've spent my whole working life in the bottom left quandant and never been shown anywhere else and these stupid graph seem to be rolled out at a drop of a hat.
If I see another one of these stupid graphs I'm going to scream.  How gullible do they think people are.
Strangely, the junior staff seem to lap it up. Aaah but in ten years time hehe
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What you need to do is overlay the graph with a horizontal axis of salary and vertical axis of, say, "days of paid vacation".
Then you point out the correlation between salary and vacation days with whatever is supposed to be in the top right corner.
And to make the point clearer, have everyone plot their salary and perk package, including the f***ing managers and the point out that since leadership is already in the upper right corner, but the rest of the peons are not, there must be something wrong with leadership skills.
Marc
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The sad part is, I was a manger for about ten years, but I never used these stupid graphs and 101 management techniques.
Maybe that's why grinds so much. I'm getting a bit old and cynical because I've seen it all and all the stupid politics they love to play. Its the reason I got out it.
Hence the graph you suggest might not be the best... I still get my managerial pay and perks. Although I lose my company car(but they do buy me out) in October!
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Ah, reality.
That does not work with managers very well. They apparently believe that reality is defined by the stream of hollow phrases that comes out of the dry gray sponges between their ears. Even when reality comes back to bite them into their rear parts, they still believe that nobody notices the small differences between their speeches and what's going on.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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CDP1802 wrote: Even when reality comes back to bite them into their rear parts, they still believe that nobody notices
I dug up about 8 years of budgeting info last week and and innocently asked a manager if they wanted that plotted against performance. Somebody is going to get a serious ass chewing.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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Sneak in before the meeting starts and rotate the chart 180 degrees.
You will then be in the top right corner, albeit upside down. 
Once you lose your pride the rest is easy.
In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you. – Buddha
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It will also raise the question why every caption or text has been written in Russian. 
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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все больше оснований, чтобы сделать это.
Once you lose your pride the rest is easy.
In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you. – Buddha
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Read an interesting article/exposé a few years back by a former management consultant who said that just about any change in management works for a little while, though not longer than a year, which is what the management change industry depends on.
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I'd agree. In our Company we turn over CEO's about every five years. Every new CEO likes to think he is making a difference by doing a restructure.
When joined 17 years ago, the field staff (half the company) where insourced. Since then they have outsourced, insourced again and now the latest CEO is looking at outsourcing again.
A busy pendulum.. So in five years time.....
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There I was sitting at the bar, staring at my drink when a large, trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs my drink and gulps it down in one swig. "Well, whatcha' gonna do about it?" he says, menacingly, as I burst into tears." Come on, man," the biker says, "I didn't think you'd CRY. I can't stand to see a man crying."
"This is the worst day of my life," I say. I'm a complete failure. I was late to a meeting and my boss fired me. When I went to the parking lot, I found my car had been stolen and I don't have any insurance. I left my wallet in the cab I took home. I found my wife with another man and then my dog bit me.
"So I came to this bar to work up the courage to put an end to it all. I buy a drink, I drop a capsule in and sit here watching the poison dissolve; then you show up and drink the whole thing! But enough about me, how's your day going?"
/ravi
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Oldie but a goodie.
New version: WinHeist Version 2.1.1 new web site.
I know the voices in my head are not real but damn they come up with some good ideas!
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It didn't make me sick, but, made me want to sleep.
 Good night everybody, (as per Pakistan Standard Time)
The sh*t I complain about
It's like there ain't a cloud in the sky and it's raining out - Eminem
~! Firewall !~
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Sorry, couldn't help it. Album with the song.[^]
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
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Great. Now that song is stuck in my head.
And I'm not even a native...
cheers
Chris Maunder
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Use this[^] to flush it out.
Software Zen: delete this;
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Makes me wonder, though ...
... about where they kept the camera around take-off time (between ~20 and ~45 seconds into the video).
Not sure whether mere zooming can achieve this. Or is it mixed with graphics?
modified 13-Jun-15 0:38am.
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Yes, an interesting point.
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Just tried the free version[^] on a small VB project.
The tool ROCKS! Only a couple minor things needed to be cleaned up, and it also puts comments in for where it made important decisions. Simple user interface, it generates a complete folder with solution files and project files (as in, it doesn't just convert VBarf, it actually rebuilds the entire solution for you with C# code.)
Recommended.
Marc
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And miss out on a perfect opportunity to write some good 'ol VB!? NEVER!
[Edit]
I read that the other way around. The VB has already been written...
I guess someone already took that perfect opportunity
[/Edit]
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Sander Rossel wrote: And miss out on a perfect opportunity to write some good 'ol VB charge a client a small fortune to convert it to C#!? NEVER!
FTFY
If it's not broken, fix it until it is
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 Thanks for the link.
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
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Looks like an awesome tool, need to add to the Free Tools[^] section.
New version: WinHeist Version 2.1.1 new web site.
I know the voices in my head are not real but damn they come up with some good ideas!
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I think I'd consider that the first turd polisher that actually works.
I'm retired. There's a nap for that...
- Harvey
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