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I have recently been advertising myself as a plumber. Plumbers fix systems, clogged with other people's shiit and that is what we do. If it wasn't clogged, they wouldn't be calling us.
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Ernst Stavro Blofeld wrote: If it wasn't clogged, they wouldn't be calling us. Pretty sure I saw a video once where something like this happened. There may have been some funky guitar in the background...
The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative. -Winston Churchill
America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. -Oscar Wilde
Wow, even the French showed a little more spine than that before they got their sh*t pushed in.[^] -Colin Mullikin
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I do believe I saw the same video!
The young lady housewife wasn't wearing much was she - the plumber must have been very embarrassed...
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
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Ya but did the plumber lay some pipe?
If it's not broken, fix it until it is
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Roto. Rooter.
Software Zen: delete this;
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Colin Mullikin wrote: There may have been some funky guitar in the background.
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Ernst Stavro Blofeld wrote: Plumbers fix systems, clogged with other people's shiit and that is what we do.
Except usually a clog is just in one pipe. Sure, it may take a 50 foot snake to clear it, but then it's done, unless the pipe is infested with the roots of some tree downstream, then you usually call someone else.
Point being, it's one pipe, one tool, and a lot of muck. Code sh*t is a maze of pipes, numerous tools, and the muck never seems to go away, it just gets pushed around to other pipes.
Marc
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Have you ever inherited code from good programmers?
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
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I have recently, actually. One of our senior devs left the company for greener pastures and I moved into his team to pick up his work. His code is actually quite nice, and a lot of it is way beyond stuff I have ever done before, so his intuitive naming conventions and copious comments are quite helpful.
The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative. -Winston Churchill
America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. -Oscar Wilde
Wow, even the French showed a little more spine than that before they got their sh*t pushed in.[^] -Colin Mullikin
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Nice, I must say it's not too often I hear that.
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
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Pity the bad programmer who inherits code from a good programmer. He probably wouldn't understand any of it.
I may not last forever but the mess I leave behind certainly will.
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You are dead, and you've gone to heaven.
Lucky you.
Software Zen: delete this;
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Quote: intuitive naming conventions and copious comments ...is that the sound of the wings flapping on that flock of pigs flying by?
Actually, I do that myself - but usually I am the only one that sees them. I still appreciate them six months, or more, later when coming back to the code.
- I would love to change the world, but they won’t give me the source code.
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jeron1 wrote: Have you ever inherited code from good programmers?
No, because good code from good programmers usually doesn't result in the client getting pissed off at the development team and switching to another code house.
Marc
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I knew there was a reason I liked you.
Where I work no one writes garbage code. We just have different "programming styles", or so I've been told.
Personally, I prefer not to cover buffalo chips with ketchup and call them fries. And it doesn't matter to me who wrote the garbage code: me (more than my fair share), you, Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Mark Whatshisname, or the Pope. Garbage code is still garbage code whether or not the application works as the user wants.
"...JavaScript could teach Dyson how to suck." -- Nagy Vilmos
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Z.C.M. wrote: buffalo chips with ketchup and call them fries. BWWs Buffalo Chips[^]
They're actually quite a bit better than fries...
The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative. -Winston Churchill
America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. -Oscar Wilde
Wow, even the French showed a little more spine than that before they got their sh*t pushed in.[^] -Colin Mullikin
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Marc Clifton wrote: bad programmers Also known as anyone other than one's self.
There are only 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't.
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RyanDev wrote: Also known as anyone other than one's self.
Give this man a quarter.
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No quarter given, nor expected.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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RyanDev wrote: Also known as anyone other than one's self.
Quite so, but I tend to rank myself in the "least bad" category.
Marc
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I like the name Critical Software Development, the implication is that if it is not critical you don't need me! I think it may still be registered to me in Oz!
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity
RAH
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No developer ever sets out to write bad code. Every developer writes the best code they can given the time, information and skills they have at the time. With hindsight, we can all look back at even our best work and see room for improvement.
"There are two ways of constructing a software design: One way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult." - C.A.R. Hoare
Home | LinkedIn | Google+ | Twitter
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When I look at what I'm currently working on, there must have been a contest over many years to write the worst and most unmaintainable code.
The language is JavaScript. that of Mordor, which I will not utter here
This is Javascript. If you put big wheels and a racing stripe on a golf cart, it's still a f***ing golf cart.
"I don't know, extraterrestrial?"
"You mean like from space?"
"No, from Canada."
If software development were a circus, we would all be the clowns.
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Dominic Burford wrote: No developer ever sets out to write bad code.
On the other hand, there are developers that should have the self-introspection to step away from the keyboard.
Marc
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And of course your projects and code are perfect! Calm down dear, take a chill pill and thank your lucky stars you aren't shovelling sh*t for a living!
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