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Message Closed
modified 27-Mar-17 13:57pm.
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You assume too much and this seems more destructive condensation than constructive feedback. Might be worthwhile gleaning from the other posts here to get a feel for their tone. I'm learning to avoid toxic people now so I no longer become one, and you sir are such. Have a nice day.
Jeremy Falcon
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I see your point and have deleted my comment. I was making assumption, and interpreting this subject in a negative light. There is nothing in the topic that would convey the... I suppose superiority complex or egotism I was presuming. Considering this is the Lounge where I come to see light, good-natured, and entertaining conversations I should not have gone that direction.
My experience with smartest person in the room usually has a person who thinks it is them and is condescending to others. I automatically, and probably incorrectly, placed OP in that group instead of the preferred group where the truly smartest person makes others feel as though they are by being open-minded and encouraging instead of overbearing or patronizing. I should remember to take the second group with me instead of the first.
Thank you, I did not even realize I was being so negative and pessimistic. I need to pickup a Terry Pratchett or Douglas Adams tonight and reboot in a better mindset tomorrow.
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Then you are a smart cookie. And I totally get it. I've been doing that myself quite a lot for the past year. Funny how interpretation works... especially over such a dry medium as the web.
Perhaps I should've posted it in the SB, but I at least genuinely wanted some folks to see it. Anywho, it's all good.
And you're absolutely correct about your experiences. I couldn't agree with you more. Which is why I have to keep myself in check to make sure it's not ego talking. Which I'm totally susceptible to.
Jeremy Falcon
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Aside from the suggestion to get involved in side projects, I'm getting the sense you may not have gotten a satisfying response yet, so I'll throw my two cents in.
Share and teach what you know
You could use the excess intellectual bandwidth to find ways to help others past the "dazed and confused" state they are in. Find ways to make what you're doing more clear, concise and engaging. This in itself can be challenging. It's one thing to design and implement complex solutions which you understand, but it's something completely different to create/design/implement solutions which are simple, elegant and accessible to others. I'm not suggesting you dumb down what you do, but rather, play to the room. If the room isn't at your level, then work on getting them there. If your peers aren't willing to try and get passed the "dazed and confused" stage, that indicates a problem of the will and not necessarily intellect. If this is the case, then find somewhere that a)Has people that are closer to your level or b)Has people that are open to learning.
The developers I've admired and respected most have been the ones that have been not only been incredibly intelligent, but who also had a desire to share and teach others.
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You are correct sir. It turns out I'm in a bit of a toxic environment, and I do agree it goes back to poor will. As such, I believe the best course is to simply change environments and then take heed to what you're saying. I don't want to be toxic anymore.
Jeremy Falcon
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I know how you feel. That's my experience as well. However, as many on this thread have said, there are MANY dimensions of intelligence. And as you find new dimensions that are initially exciting and full of wonder, they too fade into drudgery of work once you begin to master them and tackle the deeper issues. It really is hard work in every dimension once you get past the initial fun hump.
If you are bored, you either aren't challenged, or you don't like challenges and just want the fun. If you're aren't challenged, you can find another job. There are tons of great employers doing exciting work. You can start your own company. You could read more about things you don't know. You could join or start a side project (or six). Lots of options. If you don't like challenges and just like to complain, then you're not as intelligent as you think - intelligent people solve problems.
If you are great at coding, how are you at business? How well are you paid compared to your peers?
I went into independent consulting over 10 years ago because I couldn't find any employers that could match the marketplace. When I'm working with a client's employees, it is not untypical for me to be making more than double what their best paid people make. I work lots of hours and get paid for them. So that's part of the equation.
I've been on a pattern of taking two years out of every six to try and start my own businesses. I can the money I save from consulting and use it to fund my entrepreneurial persuits.
I'm on the tail end of one of those cycles. I've spent the last two years building some pretty cool tech that I will be releasing this summer. I'm not sure if I will make my money back precisely (especially considering the opportunity cost of not working for two years), but it is worth it to me. If the risk pays off, it could pay off huge. If not, I always learn so much during those self driven cycles.
My last venture didn't work out, but I shoot for the moon. This time I bit off something I could chew. It still ended up being a crazy amount of work though. And yet I think I'll have e something that I can grow and build upon (unlike the last venture which I had to fold).
Find a pattern that works for you. Don't let your environment or apathy be the reason you don't succeed in your goals.
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Mark, you are spot on. About everything. I have nothing to say except that you should know I read every word and agree. Turns out I'm in a toxic environment, and it's brought out the worst in me. I needed to read this. Thanks.
Jeremy Falcon
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A "really smart" person would figure out that there is as much to be learned from others, what not to do, for example, for himself.
I believe you have been spending too much time in front of a mirror, or maybe you have some social disorder. I would look into that.
Other people do not stifle your "personal development or growth", you do.
Just so you know that I understand, I have an IQ of 141. Your problem is not with your "intelligence" it is with your empathy. I would knock of the "Humble Bragging", and worry more about what you are contributing to society than what it is doing for you.
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You're actually spot on. I've come to realize over the weekend that I'm just in a toxic environment. My weaknesses have shown through because of it. It's not something I'm proud of, but I can remove myself from the toxicity at least, so I can go back to being a good person... or at least try to be.
Jeremy Falcon
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I have this problem too (Sorry this was how I read it!) Go for Marcs solution if you can.
"In situations where you clearly know you're the smartest in the room, save a few germs you meet on occasion?"
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Oh I'm not oversensitive. it is a problem if one can't learn to handle it. I mean the end result is we should all be happy right? So in that respect it's a problem. About to check out his post...
Jeremy Falcon
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Jeremy,
I have walked your path to discover:
Frustration = (Expectation - Reality) * EGO; // I had it posted on my wall to remind me
So, we become so smart, that we see where Reality SHOULD BE (Expectation), and that DIFFERENCE is a little unnerving (people who think nobody should starve, realizing millions are starving).
The last factor is your EGO (or mine, back then). It makes the problem worse.
If you had NO EGO, the difference would not bother you. This is often thought of wisdom. where the wise old man laughs at the folly of the youthful in tilting at windmills.
Also, when everything is as it should be, all is fine. One feels no frustration.
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Wow, man I have nothing to say except that's you're spot on. I keep getting caught up in the should be this way mentality. I've also come to learn that I'm just in a toxic environment, and that's only made the issue worse... my EGO and weaknesses have shown through a bit too much.
I'm glad I talked to you guys (CP) about this.
Jeremy Falcon
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That's a great formula!
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There are so many things you could do...
- Get over yourself. Your writing isn't that smart. You're probably misperceiving how much other people "get it". I'm a smart guy too, but I never claim to be the smartest guy in the room. Even if it might be true, you must develop the habit of slapping yourself whenever you begin to think that, and look for the things you're missing that your colleagues are getting.
- Marry a smart woman. She'll put you in your place post haste, not necessarily by putting you down, but merely by having brilliant insights you hadn't had.
- Get a new job working with/for smart people. When interviewing, I always say my goal is to be the dumbest guy in the room, so I can learn the most.
- Learn something new and technical. That'll put you in your place right away. Get that dumbass novice feeling back. It'll make you more humble. And if it doesn't, then you just were lazy and didn't pick something hard enough.
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Not really interested in your condescending post. Go away.
Jeremy Falcon
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Wasn't intended as condescention, but as a list of antidotes for feeling like you're the smartest person in the room. I get that if you were humble-bragging, you don't really want this list.
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Fair enough. I suppose if I felt superior and liked it then I'd need a dose of keep-it-real medicine; it wouldn't give me anxiety though if I liked it. I tried to make that point clear. Maybe I should've tried harder. In retrospect it may be due to communication issues that are deep rooted in me. And being in a toxic environment didn't really help.
I get where you're coming from though. Putting myself in your place I'd probably assume the same thing.
Jeremy Falcon
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I understand your feelings.
I have a developer friend who felt more or less the same as you describe - he was IMHO the smartest person around his work circle (a government financial institution), and was actually treated like a rock star by his peers. He really SHINED, but felt unsatisfied and was looking for a much bigger intellectual challenge. He actually managed to enter a top-tier software company, and the frustration went the other way; now he was surrounded by extremely smart people that often offered better solutions, or could program much faster than he could; the bar got so high that suddenly he had become just an average developer. He tries to stay positive and humble, as he is now in a position where he is learning and pushing himself more; he also misses - A LOT - his old job
I guess that what I'm somehow trying to express is that frustration can go both ways and as much as everything in life, job satisfaction is a delicate act of balance. I know - easier said than done.
I sincerely hope brighter days lay ahead for you! =)
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That's exactly it!!! Here, I'm the only person that's gotten a rockstar award like - ever. And I know I'm not the best developer in the world. But here you'd think I was. This is exactly what I'm going through, and well at times I miss being able to grow. Here I'm stagnant.
Thanks for the kind words.
Jeremy Falcon
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This will take real self awareness and reflection, and I think using the words "smartest person in the room" is dangerous because it can make you arrogant and complacent. Avoid situations and companies where you are the only person learning and growing, but be open to learning from others. Everyone needs to learn to identify what other people know that they don't. Without knowing the specifics of your situation maybe the truth is that the other people are merely interested in learning different things?
On the other hand, most companies are stagnant and a little stupid and the fact that they haven't yet bankrupted themselves or been superseded by a smarter more nimble competitor is remarkable!
Idaho Edokpayi
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Thanks for this man. And what you speak of is truth. What I think the issue really is, rather than saying everyone is stupid, is we have a bunch of people with social anxiety issues here that are overly stressed. Getting in their heads too much and thus not paying attention to anything. So they lack clarity.
Idaho Edokpayi wrote: On the other hand, most companies are stagnant and a little stupid and the fact that they haven't yet bankrupted themselves or been superseded by a smarter more nimble competitor is remarkable!
Preach it brother.
Jeremy Falcon
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I think many of us have been where you are. The truth is that for most of us THERE IS NO HAPPY PLACE. Maybe you can work for yourself?
As coders we have to learn that most businesses are not in the business of code - stupid code is ok as long as it makes money. However, business does not seem to be aware of the extent that code can disrupt the current way that they do business.
Idaho Edokpayi
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