|
Doctor: why did you not talk earlier about this?
Patient: we could use the eggs.
Bastard Programmer from Hell
If you can't read my code, try converting it here[^]
"If you just follow the bacon Eddy, wherever it leads you, then you won't have to think about politics." -- Some Bell.
|
|
|
|
|
I'm guessing that loses something in he translation; eggxactly what, I don't know but I'll make an eggducated guess.
Keep your friends close. Keep Kill your enemies closer.
The End
|
|
|
|
|
Why is the patient apologizing after a long pause?
throughout my life, my two greatest assets have been mental stability and being, like, really smart.
modified 20-Oct-19 21:02pm.
|
|
|
|
|
|
No no, the name must be "The smiley nebula"
|
|
|
|
|
Nice!
|
|
|
|
|
Should condoms be used on every conceivable occasion?
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
|
|
|
|
|
Not if they have just been released from jail.
... such stuff as dreams are made on
|
|
|
|
|
Only when it won't rubber the wrong way.
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
|
|
|
|
|
You sous-vide too much.
Bastard Programmer from Hell
If you can't read my code, try converting it here[^]
"If you just follow the bacon Eddy, wherever it leads you, then you won't have to think about politics." -- Some Bell.
|
|
|
|
|
There was a young lady from idlewild
Who kept herself quite undefiled
By thinking of Jesus
Contagious diseases
And the dangers of having a child
Ad astra - both ways!
|
|
|
|
|
(Hot off the press...)
I met a young lady at Amherst
Who said she would let me be her first
She said she was scared
Still she was prepared
To make me so glad I could burst
|
|
|
|
|
I prefer new ones myself.
|
|
|
|
|
/ravi
|
|
|
|
|
Especially if there's a chance of a misconception.
|
|
|
|
|
Especially by Welshmen in the meadows
|
|
|
|
|
Despite the risk of being left holding the bag . . . ?
Best pun in days - you're on an (un)roll
At the end of the previous sentence is a missed period - ooops!
Ravings en masse^ |
---|
"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
|
|
|
|
|
Immaculate idea!
I'm pretty sure I would not like to live in a world in which I would never be offended.
I am absolutely certain I don't want to live in a world in which you would never be offended.
Freedom doesn't mean the absence of things you don't like.
Dave
|
|
|
|
|
Most people don't know that condoms have a serial number.
Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film. Steven Wright
|
|
|
|
|
|
I've received a mail from a possible customer from Switzerland.
That customer is somebody that wants me to train him in the use of a specific software.
I am not from Switzerland.
How do you bill the job to a new customer that is from a different country?
A) 100% at the beginning?
B) Given you don't know the specific amount you ask for a certain amount that cover a specific number of working hours?
C) Sending the bill after the work is done and pray?
D) Other. Please explain.
I've worked for different countries before... no problems for that, but with people I know... In that case I usually ask for a percent at the beginning and the final part at the end, or I simply get some money at the end of the next month...
In that case I probably would go for the B option, but... is there any other option you are using or any other one that you prefer?
Thank you all in advance!
|
|
|
|
|
Generally with a new customer, I'd ask for x% as pro forma (normally this will cover the immediate costs but without profit for me). Then y% on delivery (invoiced, with 30 days), and the balance (normally 10%, invoiced, 30 days) as "retention" for one month.
If they meet the payment terms, then I'm fine with them. If they pay late, or they are a PITA to work with then they get a higher rate next time to cover my increased costs in chasing the buggers!
Bad command or file name. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaaay...
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
|
|
|
|
|
Keep your friends close. Keep Kill your enemies closer.
The End
|
|
|
|
|
I would charge 200%, those Swiss are filthy rich
|
|
|
|
|
I hope you don't mind if when they pay with chocolate.
Ravings en masse^ |
---|
"The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you are seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
|
|
|
|