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You're on a new project starting today, but you've to support your current project for all time to come, working beyond office hours if needed.
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For me "Now that you're done I'm handing the system over to the other team" it's the best thing they can announce. No longer my problem, sunshines!
GCS d--(d-) s-/++ a C++++ U+++ P- L+@ E-- W++ N+ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t+ 5? X R+++ tv-- b+(+++) DI+++ D++ G e++ h--- r+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
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That's why I never share my phone # with my direct manager. Especially as it's a cell phone, and they don't pay for it...
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All my phones are strangely malfunctioning, doesn't matter the brand, age... I am not receiving any call, who knew it.
GCS d--(d-) s-/++ a C++++ U+++ P- L+@ E-- W++ N+ o+ K- w+++ O? M-- V? PS+ PE- Y+ PGP t+ 5? X R+++ tv-- b+(+++) DI+++ D++ G e++ h--- r+++ y+++* Weapons extension: ma- k++ F+2 X
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I have been known to tell people in the past that I only ever answer calls coming from people in my phonebook. Funnily enough, it's only a few seconds later that I often need to decline the offer of their number.
I think Dale Carnegie may have written about that technique.. 
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We're get used to manager, C level, or customer related things, they're part of the job, unfortunately. We can't control everything. I can understand that.
But...
What do you mean we're out of coffee? 
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When there is no money for office supplies (e.g. coffee), next week there will be no money for payroll. It's a deathnail.
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I once was employed by a software firm like that. Every week they would cater a huge lunch for staff. Then after lunch announce how they would be short on payroll...
It especially ranked when they made sure the co-op students were paid (otherwise the universities they came from would have yanked them out).
When I started, I made it clear if I didn't get paid I was out of there, so I lasted for quite some time. But eventually it happened. I also happened to hang onto the Macbook pro they gave me to work with, until they finally settled and paid me...
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When there is no coffee, the likelihood of violence skyrockets. Always bad for development.
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
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