|
I like #12
1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you ...but it's still on my list.
3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
5. We never really grow up -- we only learn how to act in public.
6. War does not determine who is right, only who is left.
7. Knowledge, is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
9. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
10. In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of an emergency, notify..." I answered "a doctor."
11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
12. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
13. I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
14. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
15. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
16. You're never too old to learn something stupid.
17. I'm supposed to respect my elders, but it's getting harder and harder for me to find one now. Sadly, this is true!!!
|
|
|
|
|
|
Hi!
Also, some ifs don't have braces. respect diversity.
*hides*
Real programmers use butterflies
|
|
|
|
|
|
I find the excessive use of exclamation points and the shouting to be offensive and rude. please stop and respect my feelings. 
modified 2-Apr-21 8:32am.
|
|
|
|
|
Bracist! 
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
|
|
|
|
|
Mike Hankey wrote: 1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it there's a bunch of vultures.
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
|
|
|
|
|
Sadly, #17 is really true. 
If you can keep your head while those about you are losing theirs, perhaps you don't understand the situation.
|
|
|
|
|
Reminds me of the eternal wit of Yogi Berra:
Quote: Always Go To Other People’s Funerals — Otherwise, They Won’t Come To Yours
| Ravings en masse^ |
|---|
| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
|
|
|
|
|
Nobody goes there anymore. It’s too crowded.
If you can't laugh at yourself - ask me and I will do it for you.
|
|
|
|
|
OK, you can sort of understand "we'll deliver today" messages arriving after the goods do, but ...
I used Amazon Pay to order new gloves and masks yesterday - the company didn't offer Paypal - and it worked very well.
Then, at 21:56 I got a message from Amazon saying the payment was complete - a receipt, basically.
Followed by another message at 00:03 saying:
Thank you for using Amazon Pay with [REDACTED].
You have not been charged yet. We’ll email you when your payment is complete.
Does time go backwards at Amazon? Or are their systems overloaded by demand? Because if it's the latter, there are a number of companies that provide fast, expandable cloud services that will cope automatically with increased demand ...
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
|
|
|
|
|
Just a thought - maybe they meant payment verification?
I've my charge cards set up so online billing* for anything triggers an email to me with the biller and the amount. It's almost instantaneous.
Paraphrasing Yogi Berra (I guess it's a day for quoting him): "It ain't billed 'till it's billed".
* also any charge over a settable threshold and gas stations.
| Ravings en masse^ |
|---|
| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
|
|
|
|
|
No, they actually meant the financial transaction was complete, the money had left my account and entered theirs:
Hi [DELETED],
We have processed your payment of [DELETED] using the payment method shown.
- Thank you for using Amazon Pay.
Summary
Charge amount
[DELETED]
Payment method
MasterCard [DELETED]
Amazon Pay payment ID
P[DELETED]8
Payment date
Thursday, 1 April 2021 13:05:52 BST
Merchant information
[DELETED]
Merchant order ID
1[DELETED]3 And a check on my account shows the money had left the premises.
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
"Common sense is so rare these days, it should be classified as a super power" - Random T-shirt
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
|
|
|
|
|
Well, then there's only one feasible explanation: AstraZeneca.
| Ravings en masse^ |
|---|
| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
|
|
|
|
|
but I can not find a good, quick introduction, anyone can share some good experience/links?
diligent hands rule....
|
|
|
|
|
|
Hmm. I can think of a company or two where I'd like to try it.
Of course, what I would fix would be their ability to continue foisting their crap on an unsuspecting world create software...
Software Zen: delete this;
|
|
|
|
|
Good one! Though I cannot imagine the level of OCD that would drive someone to do that.
"the debugger doesn't tell me anything because this code compiles just fine" - random QA comment
"Facebook is where you tell lies to your friends. Twitter is where you tell the truth to strangers." - chriselst
"I don't drink any more... then again, I don't drink any less." - Mike Mullikins uncle
|
|
|
|
|
Yes. Sepellchecking.
"though", should be "thought".
Bastard Programmer from Hell 
"If you just follow the bacon Eddy, wherever it leads you, then you won't have to think about politics." -- Some Bell.
|
|
|
|
|
... and 'thought' should be 'though' when its mispelled!
|
|
|
|
|
They're called chores ... and there's a jar full of them.
It was only in wine that he laid down no limit for himself, but he did not allow himself to be confused by it.
― Confucian Analects: Rules of Confucius about his food
|
|
|
|
|
My Mrs. keeps a list of what she wants me to do - it's around somewhere . . .
| Ravings en masse^ |
|---|
| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
|
|
|
|
|
Dang, pretty extreme!
I've got a list but don't think I've got enough time if I were to apply at Microsoft!
|
|
|
|
|
Yes, I have considered doing something like this!
And there are a few companies I'd like to buy just to fix them according to my preferences, were I to win the lottery jackpot.
Problem is (as far as these fantasy plans go), most companies where I would like to change something as an employee are too big to be able to guarantee working on the thing that bothers me, and most companies I'd love to buy (were I a lottery winner) are too big even for a lottery winner to buy.
|
|
|
|
|
You don't necessarily need to buy them, just buy enough shares to have a voice / vote / veto in the board 
M.D.V.
If something has a solution... Why do we have to worry about?. If it has no solution... For what reason do we have to worry about?
Help me to understand what I'm saying, and I'll explain it better to you
Rating helpful answers is nice, but saying thanks can be even nicer.
|
|
|
|
General 
News 
Suggestion 
Question 
Bug 
Answer 
Joke 
Praise 
Rant 
Admin 
Submit an article or tip
