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Bribery? Rot! (10)
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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Corruption ?
"We can't stop here - this is bat country" - Hunter S Thompson - RIP
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That lasted a load longer than I figured - but you are up tomorrow! 
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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I actually did it about 9.30 - CP clock having an off day ?
"We can't stop here - this is bat country" - Hunter S Thompson - RIP
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Hamsters have Coronavirus?
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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It was a drink when I was a kid
"We can't stop here - this is bat country" - Hunter S Thompson - RIP
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Next year we get Tizervirus... 
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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I just got a job offer that requires Wherescape(?) + SQL Server Microsoft experience, also experience in SQL server development and Transact-SQL (I guess those aren't included in SQL Server Microsoft  ).
Furthermore they require (and I quote):
- Cloud experience
- Workflow experience
- Devops [no experience here]
- Coding experience
- Testing experience
That's a lot of experience 
Some general experience is required, we'll figure it out as we go? 
I actually had that once, went on a job application for C# and Azure in a specific city, but once there they were like "maybe we'll use Node.js or Java and it might be in another city, but for now we just need to interview people."
Later I heard the whole project got cancelled, thanks for wasting my time, idiots!
Maybe this is something like that... Needless to say I won't be responding 
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Sounds like "Where's the scapegoat" to me 
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They didn't ask for 5 years experience with SQL Server 2017?
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Don't forget the 10 years experience with .NET Core 3.0! 
"These people looked deep within my soul and assigned me a number based on the order in which I joined."
- Homer
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I guess these days its all about the experience !!! and not about actually doing anything about it...
Caveat Emptor.
"Progress doesn't come from early risers – progress is made by lazy men looking for easier ways to do things." Lazarus Long
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What to do, as an honest and capable developer, is take the list of "requirements" in the "job specifications", and copy and paste it to the bottom of your CV.
That way, it will get past the HR wankers keyword-checkers superior beings, and find its way to the people who are looking to find a colleague, and who probably didn't ask for a third of the listed requirements.
No, I am not joking; not even a little bit. Do precisely that -- give it a heading like "Summary of Position Applied For".
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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If you make the font small enough it'll look line a nice line across the bottom of the page (old res trick)
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what is this HR thing you speak of? These days, it's a website, not people..... 
Charlie Gilley
<italic>Stuck in a dysfunctional matrix from which I must escape...
"Where liberty dwells, there is my country." B. Franklin, 1783
“They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” BF, 1759
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Human Resources isn't a department, it's a state of insanity mind.
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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I like the ones that ask for more year's of experience in a specific technology or topic, then how long that tech/topic has been available/active/alive.
It's much easier to enjoy the favor of both friend and foe, and not give a damn who's who. -- Lon Milo DuQuette
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Typically they ask for "experience in: many things because
1. they want to throw anything they like at you
2. inevitably most the tasks they give you will have little to do with anything they asked for experience in.
"can you look after these old [ill suited [often blackbox] to their business flow] [cr]apps on our [motley collection of stale] pc's."
later on they'll ask you why you aren't applying you experience
"where's you magic mate? we're still stuck here using the same systems [that you had no choice in],"
... of course and your suggestions to change were soundly ignored/vetoed.
Oh sh*t! - Just described this job I recently took on with promises of good things.
.... time to fix that, ... note to HR sent.
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Is "Political Asylum" where we keep the government?
"I have no idea what I did, but I'm taking full credit for it." - ThisOldTony
AntiTwitter: @DalekDave is now a follower!
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I know where you're coming from, the particular place to which you refer is spelled with two "s"'s .
None are likely to end up in Political Elysium.
| Ravings en masse^ |
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| "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." - Albert Einstein | | "If you are searching for perfection in others, then you seek disappointment. If you seek perfection in yourself, then you will find failure." - Balboos HaGadol Mar 2010 |
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Well the inmates are certainly running it!
If you can't laugh at yourself - ask me and I will do it for you.
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That's wishful thinking, no?
I wanna be a eunuchs developer! Pass me a bread knife!
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Obligatory Wizard of Id
Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make four. If that is granted, all else follows.
-- 6079 Smith W.
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More likely where we SHOULD keep the government! 
Anything that is unrelated to elephants is irrelephant
Anonymous
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The problem with quotes on the internet is that you can never tell if they're genuine
Winston Churchill, 1944
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Never argue with a fool. Onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
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Went to the animal shelter last Friday.
I somehow thought it was necessary to get the most scared cat they had, so that's what I now have
She went straight under the couch and from there she went under the kitchen to the one place in the house where I can't see or reach her (in crevices I didn't even know where there).
A weekend has passed and she's still under the kitchen.
At least she eats, drinks and uses the litter box when I'm not around.
She'll turn around and we'll be good friends in ten years or so
Some pictures on Facebook[^] (you can view them without an account)
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